


Virus

by Frikkstikk



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Polyamory, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-04-30 09:57:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 29,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5159489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frikkstikk/pseuds/Frikkstikk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set post-pacifist run. Mettaton gets sick and it's up to the skeleton brothers to make him feel better. But someone doesn't want him to get better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Concert

"SO, SANS, ARE YOU COMING OR NOT?"  
  
  
  
Papyrus's voice pulled Sans out of his daze. He shook his head clear of the daydreams he was just having. What did he tell Papyrus about talking to him when he was sleeping? He glanced around his and Papyrus's living room. His brother was accompanied by Undyne, Alphys and Frisk.  
  
"Huh? Oh yeah." Sans yawned, "Coming to what, again?"  
  
"Mettaton's concert, bonehead! Weren't you listening?" Undyne loomed over the short skeleton, who was still sitting on the couch half-asleep.  
  
"So the robot's throwing a concert. He always does that. What makes this one special?" Sans didn't mean for that to come out so rude.  
  
But it was true, Mettaton was always having concerts with his cousin and Shyren.  
  
"HE GAVE ME FREE TICKETS TO SHARE AND I AM CHOOSING TO SHARE THEM WITH YOU, UNDYNE, ALPHYS AND FRISK." Papyrus gestured to each person with great enthusiasm as he said their name.  
  
"Hold on, you're telling me _Mettaton_ gave you something for free? This is the Mettaton we know you're talking about, right?" Sans put his hands up to emphasize his point.  
  
"ISN'T IT OBVIOUS, BROTHER? THE POOR ROBOT HAS FALLEN FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS'S CHARMS AND HAS OFFERED ME A GIFT TO WIN OVER MY HEART," Papyrus fished out the tickets and offered one to Sans.  
  
Sans's pupils darted from the pink, sparkly ticket to his brother's hopeful face. Sans reluctantly nabbed the ticket and shoved it into his jacket pocket.  
  
"Okay, I'll go." Sans slid off the couch.  
  
"HOORAY! NOW, LET US PROCEED POSTHASTE! THE GREAT PAPYRUS CANNOT BE LATE!" Papyrus led the way out their front door.  
  
  
  
Sans appeared to be in a good mood. That could be attributed to his permanent smile. Behind the grin, however, was a sour attitude. He trusted Mettaton as much as a mouse trusted a snake. He didn't hate the robot by any means, but he did not want Mettaton getting too close to his brother. Mettaton was too... lewd for Papyrus. Papyrus was not a child and could be friends with whomever he pleased, but Sans knew the pop star would take advantage of his brother's kindness.  
  
  
  
Sans was shaken away from his thoughts when a tiny hand grabbed onto his elbow.  
  
"Yeah, kid?" Sans put on his best "I'm fine" voice and gazed down at the child. Frisk looked at the skeleton for a moment and smiled. Frisk patted Sans's shoulder and pointed at Papyrus. The taller skeleton was chatting excitedly with Undyne about the concert. He seemed to really be looking forward to this. Perhaps Sans could tone down the Metta-hate for the time being. He noticed that Undyne seemed less enthused. That was probably because Alphys looked nervous- more nervous than usual. When asked about it, she responded with, "I'm worried about Mettaton," and nothing else. Sans had a sneaking suspicion that something wasn't quite right with their lovely robot friend.  
  
  
  
Papyrus was more than overjoyed to discover that their tickets were for the front row. _"That is out of character,"_ Sans thought apprehensively. He and Frisk shared uncertain glances.  
  
"OH BOY! AREN'T WE THE LUCKY ONES! YOU CAN THANK THE GREAT PAPYRUS FOR SCORING YOU ALL SUCH LOVELY SEATS. HAD I FLEXED A BIT MORE WHEN SPEAKING WITH HIM, WE MIGHT EVEN HAVE RECEIVED TICKETS TO BE ONSTAGE! NYEH HEH HEH!" Papyrus struck a heroic pose.  
  
"H-he really s-seems to like you, Papyrus," Alphys mentioned, but she didn't feel like telling Papyrus there was no such ticket.  
  
"WAS THERE EVER A DOUBT? I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS AFTER ALL," he beamed.  
  
  
  
\---  
  
  
  
During the span of the concert Sans watched the robot intensely, looking for something wrong with him. Alphys appeared to be doing the same thing, only she was jotting down notes somehow. Sans didn't see or hear anything out of the ordinary. His metallic voice was just as smooth and sensual as ever. It drifted soothingly through Sans's nonexistent ears. Mettaton's dancing was also rather pleasing to the eye. There was no twitch or spark to be seen. Maybe Mettaton was being a decent guy and there wasn't anything wrong with him.  
  
  
  
After the show, the group lingered about and waited to visit their friend backstage. They were informed by a strong-looking security guard that they could all come see the star himself. Mettaton was sitting at a table signing random objects that his fans provided him with. The line of fans had disappeared by the time they were allowed to greet him.  
  
"Oh! Darlings, it is so lovely to see you all again!" Mettaton waved at them and turned away from his signing table. He stood up and sauntered over to his friends,  
"Did you enjoy the show?"  
  
Papyrus, Alphys and Undyne congratulated him on the lovely performance in varying volumes. Frisk was silent, like they tended to be, but they offered a cheerful thumbs up. Sans offered his usual grin and even added a nod. Mettaton was delighted to hear the news,  
"Of course it was good. It had me in it."  
  
"Why exactly did you give us front row tickets for free?" Undyne decided it was time to get right down to the point.  
  
"Because, dear, I want only the best for my friends," Mettaton batted his visible eyelashes at her, "Are you saying that I cannot be humble once in a while?"  
  
"Yes," Undyne grinned.  
  
"Mettaton, h-how are you feeling?" Alphys was looking over the robot's EX form closely.  
  
"Peachy as ever, Alphys," he flashed a blinding smirk her way. "Now, I don't mean to cut your precious time with me so short, but I must carry all of these lovely gifts back to my dressing room, clean up," he sighed, trailing off, "you understand, don't you?"  
  
Alphys looked apprehensive to leave, but she figured if there was something wrong Mettaton will come see her first. She and Undyne said their goodbyes and left the building.  
  
  
  
"I see that you three are too devastated that you can't spend more time with me to leave," Mettaton seemed to be staring right at Sans, but he could be looking at Frisk. He hoped.  
  
"If that's the case, could you help me carry this to my dressing room?" The robot gestured to the piles of goodies his fans had given him. Papyrus agreed fervently and dashed over to the table. Frisk looked up at Sans and tugged on his jacket as they followed Papyrus. Sans eyed Mettaton as he walked past him. The robot gave him a smile. Sans felt a chill go down his spine.  
  
  
Mettaton showed them the way to his dressing room and allowed them inside. It was a rather elegant dressing room for someone that didn't change clothes. Mettaton and Papyrus organized the gifts by type at Papyrus's suggestion. Sans and Frisk stood back and watched in silence. Papyrus talked about his extraordinary ability to organize things the entire time. Mettaton listened without interrupting. Sans appreciated that politeness but he didn't like how often Mettaton slid his hand over his brother's on "accident."  
  
  
  
"My, my! I am impressed. You certainly do have a talent for being organized," Mettaton looked over his neat assortment of gifts.  
  
Papyrus's chest swelled with pride, "O-OF COURSE! I HAVE TO CLEAN UP AFTER SANS ALL THE TIME."  
  
Sans chuckled. He cleaned up after himself, but not as much as Papyrus would prefer him to. Mettaton hummed in response.  
  
"I can't thank you enough, dear," Mettaton gave Papyrus an earnest smile.  
  
"YOU ARE MOST WELCOME!" Papyrus grinned back.  
  
"Here!" Mettaton quickly snagged a white rose from his pile of flowers, "Take this one home with you as my thanks."  
  
Papyrus's eyebrows shot up, "IS THIS A CONFESSION OF YOUR UNDYING LOVE FOR ME, THE GREAT PAPYRUS?"  
  
Frisk snickered. They had been in Mettaton's position months ago. Sans felt his bones grow icy with tension. Mettaton, for once, had nothing to say.  
  
Papyrus spoke for him, "ALAS! ANOTHER VICTIM TO MY AMAZING CHARMS! I-I'M FLATTERED."  
  
Sans stepped between them and addressed Papyrus, "I think it's about time we went home. It's past Frisk's bedtime."  
  
"AH, YES! TORIEL MUST BE QUITE WORRIED," Papyrus switched his attention to his brother momentarily. "YOU ARE WELCOME FOR MY SERVICES, METTATON. THIS IS MY NUMBER. CALL IT WHEN YOU NEED ORGANIZING... OR SPAGHETTI," Papyrus announced, handing the robostar a slip of paper.  
  
Mettaton's bewildered expression quickly changed into a suave smirk, "Will do, darling."

  
  
Sans couldn't usher them out of the building fast enough. He was tempted to use a shortcut, but ultimately decided against it.  
  
"WOW, SANS, YOU MUST REALLY CARE ABOUT FRISK BEING HOME ON TIME," Papyrus easily kept up with Sans's quick stride.  
  
Frisk, with their small child legs, was having a bit more trouble keeping up.  
  
Sans slowed down, "Yeah. Can't get Frisk in trouble, y'know."  
  
"IF ONLY YOU CARED ABOUT BEING ON TIME MORE OFTEN," Papyrus chuckled.  
  
Sans offered a weak laugh in response. He stared at his slippers as he continued to walk. He couldn't help but feel a weight in his stomach, not that he had a stomach. Maybe Mettaton was fine and there was something wrong with _him_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you would prefer Sans/MTT or Papyrus/MTT. Rating will change and more characters will be added as chapters progress.


	2. The Rose

The skeletons' house was on the way to Toriel's, so Papyrus departed from the group to start a late dinner. This left Sans to take Frisk home. Sans didn't mind. He liked Frisk. Once they were a sufficient distance from his house, Sans could feel another gentle tug on his jacket. He glanced at the child. Frisk was staring at him with a determined look on their face.

"What's up, kiddo?" He grinned at them briefly.

They only stared more intensely and stopped walking. Frisk still had a grip on Sans's jacket, so he was forced to halt as well.

"Are you tired? Do you need a shortcut?" Sans took his hands out of his pockets.

Frisk shook their head energetically and folded their arms across their chest.

Sans sighed and drooped, "I can do a lot of things, kid, but I can't read minds."

"Why do you not like Papyrus being with Mettaton?" Frisk asked in their soft, tiny voice.

Sans rubbed the back of his skull with his hand, "I, uh... you'll know when you're older."

Frisk raised an eyebrow as a response.

"L-let's just keep walking," he held his hand out for Frisk to take.

Frisk pulled an irritated face but grabbed his hand regardless. Frisk allowed themselves to be pulled down the sidewalk to Toriel's house.

Before they made it to the door, Frisk tugged on Sans's jacket one last time. Sans didn't say anything, he just stared at them.

"Give Mettaton a chance, Sans. Please. He means well," Frisk released Sans's jacket and hopped up the steps to Toriel's house.

They had their hand on the doorknob when they half-turned and finished with, "I think he's not feeling well either."

Sans didn't get to comment on the statement before Frisk entered their house.

Sans took the long route home so he could have time to think. Mettaton and Papyrus seemed to really like and admire each other. At least, Papyrus admired Mettaton. Papyrus loved that robot even when he was a rectangle. Now that he had an aesthetically pleasing body to match his personality... Sans shook his head. Nope. Not going to think about Mettaton's body. Anyway, Mettaton didn't appear to have any ill-intent when he was speaking with Papyrus. But Sans had no idea what ulterior motive Mettaton was hiding- if he was even hiding one. Maybe Sans was being too overprotective. Maybe he should just let it happen. Mettaton wasn't _too_ terrible. Sans didn't like the idea of his brother dating the star, especially if there was something wrong with him- which seemed to be the case currently. But he looked fine. Alphys and Frisk must have noticed something he didn't. Maybe if Sans wasn't busy watching the hypnotic sway of those robot hips when he was dancing he could have noticed something off.

Sans arrived home before he was done thinking. He shrugged. There was always time to think tomorrow. He walked through the living room to poke his head into the kitchen. Papyrus was busy making the sauce for the spaghetti, humming all the while.

"Hey Pap," Sans let his brother know he was home.

"AH, SANS! I WAS WONDERING WHEN YOU WERE GOING TO ARRIVE," Papyrus greeted him with a smile and went back to stirring.

Sans decided to go lounge on the couch. On his way, he noticed the rose Mettaton gifted his brother was in a vase next to his pet rock. He inched over to it and gave it a sniff.

 _"What the hell?"_ Sans thought, nearly falling over as he reeled back.

 

The rose did not smell like a flower. It smelled of copper and blood. And it looked... burned?

"Papyrus, what's up with your rose?" Sans called, keeping his eyes on the now-suspicious rose.

"AH YES, THAT. IT SMELLED SO NICE AND LOOKED SO LOVELY THAT I HAD TO PUT IT IN A VASE, YOU KNOW, TO KEEP IT ALIVE LONGER. I DON'T THINK ROSES LIKE WATER, SANS. BECAUSE IT SPARKED AND A PLUME OF SMOKE CAME OUT OF IT WHEN I PUT IT IN THE VASE." Papyrus responded, not phased at all.

"Oh, okay," Sans didn't want to worry his brother by telling him flowers do not do that. He quickly glimpsed at the kitchen before he nabbed the rose and took it over to the couch for an examination.

He held the flower in his hands and felt its stem and petals. It looked and felt like an organic, normal flower. He snapped the end of the stem off and held it up to his eye. Nothing out of the ordinary. He spread the ivory petals apart with his fingers. It seemed fine, except... There were a few minuscule, black dots moving quickly around on the petals. Sans wouldn't have seen them if they weren't moving.

"SANS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Papyrus appeared behind the couch.

Sans jumped and nearly dropped the rose.

Papyrus was leaning over the back and peering at Sans's hands, "I SEE YOU HAVE TAKEN MY GIFT FROM METTATON."

"Uh, yeah, bro... I just-"

"YOU MUST BE JEALOUS. I DO NOT BLAME YOU," Papyrus shrugged.

"I-"

"IT IS SUCH A SHAME YOU DID NOT RECEIVE A GIFT. BUT DO NOT FEEL BAD! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WAS THE ONLY ONE TO BE BESTOWED WITH A TOKEN OF AFFECTION! FRISK, UNDYNE, AND ALPHYS SHARE YOUR SAD DISPOSITION OF NOT BEING FAWNED OVER BY A POP STAR!" Papyrus pat Sans on the head, "BUT THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS A HUMBLE SKELETON. I SHALL ALLOW YOU TO KEEP THIS GIFT, AS IT IS UNQUESTIONED THAT I SHALL RECEIVE MORE!"

"Jeez, Pap, you're too kind," Sans decided to roll with this.

"OF COURSE I AM! NOW COME INTO THE KITCHEN AND FEAST UPON MY SPAGHETTI!" Papyrus turned on his heel and marched into the kitchen.

Sans stared at the rose in his hands. He felt guilty. This wasn't intended for him, it was Papyrus's. But somehow, holding it made his ribs tingle. That was probably the skeleton equivalent of his heart fluttering. He took another look at the strange black dots on the petals. Flowers had bugs crawling on them all the time. However, these "bugs" appeared to not like water enough to explode when they touch it. Maybe Alphys could tell him what these things were. For now, Sans left the rose back in the vase and joined his brother in the kitchen.

After dinner, Papyrus said something quite startling, "SANS, DO YOU THINK METTATON LOOKED HOT?"

Sans nearly spat out his ketchup, "W-what'cha mean, bro?"

"EARLIER, WHEN WE WERE IN HIS DRESSING ROOM. DID HE APPEAR HOT TO YOU?" Papyrus questioned again.

"I... guess so. Why?" Sans could tell he was starting to sweat.

"WHEN HE AND I WERE ORGANIZING HIS FANS' PRESENTS, HE WOULD TOUCH HIS HAND TO MINE. AND THOUGH I DO NOT HAVE SKIN, I COULD TELL IT WAS BURNING HOT. DO YOU THINK HE MAY HAVE BEEN OVERHEATING?" Papyrus rubbed his chin in thought.

Sans nearly melted in relief.

"Maybe singing and dancing on a stage under those lights make a robot too warm for his metal," Sans shrugged.

"YES, PERHAPS... OR PERHAPS THE VERY ACT OF BEING NEXT TO THE GREAT PAPYRUS SENT HIS GEARS INTO OVERDRIVE," Papyrus bounced his eyebrows.

"Papyrus, no." Sans rubbed his temples.

"PAPYRUS, YES!" Papyrus stood up, "I THINK I SHALL CALL HIM TO CONFIRM THIS."

"Don't!" Sans surprised himself with his response.

Papyrus paused.

Sans's perma-grin faltered slightly, "He's probably... very tired from his concert. And if you call him... you don't want to rile him up again, do you?" 

"WONDERFUL POINT, SANS. TOO MUCH PAPYRUS AND HE MIGHT BLOW A FUSE. GOOD THINKING!" Papyrus saluted him and sauntered off to his room.

Sans slumped in his chair, exhausted from that conversation. Tomorrow, he was going to visit Alphys with that rose... and maybe Mettaton himself if he is up to it. (He'll never be up to it.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've seen your responses to the relationship question (MTT/Sans or MTT/Pap) and I have made my decision based on your preferences. (I can't please all of you and I'm super sorry.)


	3. Rose? What Rose?

The following day, Sans awoke late in the afternoon. He didn't feel very motivated to actually get up- he rarely ever did. But he needed to go see Alphys about that flower, so he slipped out of bed and made his way downstairs. He approached the table and reached out to grab the rose. It wasn't there. The vase was knocked over, spilling water over the table and onto the floor. Sans squinted at the puddle. There were little wet paw-prints trailing to the front door. Now Sans fully understood why Papyrus hated that bone-stealing dog so much. Speaking of Papyrus, he was nowhere to be seen. This didn't come across to Sans as a shock. His brother was always out and about. Sans heaved a great sigh and pulled out his phone.

"Hey Alphys," Sans spoke before the scientist could, "You got time?"

"Y-yeah. Is there s-something wrong, Sans?" Alphys replied, growing more nervous with every word.

"You could say that, yeah. I'll be there in a sec," Sans hung up and ambled outside.

 

By using one of his shortcuts, Sans was literally at Alphys's lab in seconds. Needless to say she was more than a bit startled when he appeared so quickly. But she knew Sans enough not to question it.

"S-so, what's the issue, Sans?" Alphys wrung her reptilian hands in front of her, "I-Is it about Mettaton?"

"Sort of," Sans glanced to the side. "After his show, he gave Pap a rose," he started. Sans noticed Alphys's expression change into an amused smile.

"That's not my problem," Sans pointed at her. Alphys attempted to look serious again.

"That rose had something on it. Tiny, fast-moving black dots. Like bugs, but they exploded in water," Sans explained.

Alphys began processing the information, "Do you have the rose?"

Sans's grin shrunk, "No, it disappeared this morning."

Alphys twiddled her fingers, "D-do you think you c-could ask Mettat-"

 _"No,"_ Sans replied, a little too quickly.

"W-why not?" Alphys's brow furrowed in confusion.

"I, uh, don't like being too close to the guy," Sans avoided eye-contact.

"C-come on, Sans! One of his f-fans could be sending him i-infected gifts! These black dots could be a-a nano-virus or something!" Alphys was borderline begging, "Earlier this m-month, he started accepting g-gifts from his fans a-as a way to connect with them. A-and since then, he's been acting s-strangely."

"Strange how?" Sans pressed.

"He's been overheating f-far too often for the middle of w-winter. He's not s-supposed to overheat at all! He's losing b-battery power faster every d-day. A-and it appears as though for a split s-second he's not in control of what he's doing," Alphys's voice was almost inaudible by the time she finished talking.

Sans let her words sink in, "Huh. So he's got a robot cold? Can't you just fix him?"

"He doesn't think t-there's anything wrong with him. He f-firmly believes he's c-completely fine and he won't let me work on him!" Alphys certainly sounded frustrated.

"Maybe someone needs to smack some sense into him," Sans grinned.

"Please, Sans, go get another of M-Mettaton's roses for me. And if you c-can talk him into l-letting me fix him, that would be sugoi." Alphys pleaded.

"What?" Sans laughed.

"Just go!" Alphys covered her face as she realized she'd been watching too much anime.

\---

Sans stood in front of Mettaton's house. It was different than the one back underground in Waterfall. It was bigger and less... round. Maybe Mettaton would just give him a rose and let him leave. That was very likely not the case. It's not like Sans was ever rude to the robot. But he didn't exactly give Mettaton a reason to like him. Perhaps he should get Papyrus to procure a rose. Oh god no. He was not letting Papyrus go into Mettaton's house. Not alone at least. He exhaled, looking at his breath drift away in the wind before knocking twice.

"Knock knock," Sans couldn't help himself.

Seconds later came a sultry robotic reply, "Who's there?"

This was not one of San's finest jokes, "Snow."

"Snow who?" Mettaton sounded like he was already cringing.

"Snow-one going to let me in now?" Sans raised his shoulders in amusement.

The door cracked open to reveal Mettaton's very irritated expression, "Really?" 

Sans snickered, "Yes."

Mettaton stepped back and allowed Sans to walk in out of the cold. The door was shut behind the skeleton. Sans suddenly felt trapped. Did he ever leave that EX form? Sans would prefer to be around the box.

"What brings you to my home, darling?" Mettaton's habit of striking poses still seemed to be prevalent, as he leaned against the door with a leg up. Sans pushed the leg back down with his fingertips. He was way too warm for comfort.

"Papyrus lost the rose you gave him. I was wondering if I could snag him another," Sans scanned Mettaton's face for signs of fatigue or "loss of control."

"Oh, how sad!" Mettaton put his hands to his cheeks. "Of course he can have another!" He stopped leaning on the door and took a few steps past Sans. "Please follow me."

Against his better judgement, Sans followed him.

"Pardon the mess, I simply do not have enough vases for all of these flowers!" Mettaton flicked a light on and allowed Sans to pass him into the room. There were hundreds of flowers from hundreds of fans, human and monster alike.

"Take as many as you wish. You are permitted to collect a few for yourself if you like," Mettaton winked at him. Or Sans thought he did. It was hard to tell with only one visible eye.

Sans tried to look for any black dots as fast as he could, but it was hard to be quick and thorough. He could feel Mettaton's stare boring through his skull. When he turned his head to the side to stare back, he realized Mettaton wasn't actually looking at him. He was staring at his reflection in one of the many mirrors in the room. Self-centered bastard.

"You certainly are taking a long time, dear." Oh god, Mettaton was walking up to him. "Are you looking for something specific?"

Sans jumped when a hand touched his shoulder. It was scalding. He could feel it through his jacket.

"Mettaton, why don't you chill?" Sans attempted to say that as nicely as possible. Didn't work so well...

"What?" The grip on Sans's shoulder grew tighter.

"You're hot," Sans took a step to the right, out of Mettaton's range.

Mettaton put his hands on his hips, "Sending me mixed messages here, Sansy."

 _Tactical error._ "I don't know if you can tell, but your metal is searing hot. Like, it's hot to the touch." Sans put his hands up in defense.

"Oh." Mettaton stood more upright, taking his hands off his hips. He ran his hands over his body, testing his temperature. Sans tensed up. He shouldn't be tensing up. _Why was he tensing up?_

"I can't tell." Mettaton shrugged, "Alphys has been telling me about that, but I think it's just this body getting accustomed to the Earth air."

"Uh huh," Sans sounded unconvinced. "You should probably get checked out."

Mettaton seemed to want to agree but- There! A twitch!- shook his head, "I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Why not? You look sick. Can robots even get sick?" Sans asked.

"Because I'm perfectly fine. I cannot bother Alphys for no reason." Mettaton replied.

Sans wondered if the robot really meant that or if he was putting up a front so no one would worry. Either way, Sans didn't want to argue with him.

"Why don't you help me look for a rose for Pap? _Preferably one with little black dots on them_ ," Sans muttered the last part.

Mettaton agreed and within minutes he had picked out a lovely bouquet of red, yellow, and white roses.

"How are these, dear?" Mettaton held out the roses for Sans to judge. Sans had given up trying to find at least one of those mysterious dots by then.

"They look great. Papyrus will love them. He'll love anything you give him." Sans said bluntly.

"Of course. My fans adore me and I adore them. I believe your brother is one of my biggest fans." Mettaton grinned. Sans wished Mettaton would stop smiling. It irritated him for some reason.

Something else that irritated him was that weird chugging sound Mettaton's chest was making. Had he been making that noise the entire time? Sans saw that the bouquet was shaking and Mettaton looked uncomfortable. Sans took the roses from him and set them on a nearby counter. The chugging noise became louder and started to sound like gravel being ground up inside a barrel.

"Hey, you okay there?" Sans took a step forward.

Suddenly, Mettaton lurched forward and a black substance came oozing out of his mouth and chest-speaker. He collapsed onto his hands and knees, trembling.

"Whoa, shit!" Sans took a step back.

The chugging sound stopped but the robot slumped over on his side, motionless.

Sans stared at the robot. He was right, there is something wrong with Mettaton. And he had to do something about it.

That is, if it wasn't too late.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heavy shipping lies ahead.


	4. Friendship Spaghetti

Sans hesitated to touch the unconscious robot at first. He felt weird about it. He quickly shook off his reservations and scooped Mettaton up from the floor. Why the sudden change? He thought of poor Papyrus's reaction to the news of his glambot's death- shortly followed by the thought of Alphys slipping into a worse depression because of it. Mettaton was very close to the scientist and it would just destroy her if he died. Plus, Mettaton wasn't really that bad of a guy and Sans might feel a little guilty if Mettaton was to turn to dust at the moment.

He used a few shortcuts to discreetly get to Alphys's lab. Sans briefly checked to see if Mettaton was indeed just unconscious. He assumed the faint whirring inside his metal chest was a sign of life and proceeded forward. 

"Hey, Al," Sans approached the scientist cautiously.

"Oh, Sans! I-I was just w-working on- OH MY GOD!" Alphys dropped her tools and rushed over to the skeleton, "What h-happened!?" She immediately began checking all of Mettaton's vitals.

"He just kinda... threw up and collapsed. I didn't know he had a stomach." Sans and Alphys placed Mettaton on Alphys's work table.

"He doesn't," Alphys took a sample of the viscous black stuff coming out of the robot. She disappeared behind a door and came back moments later.

Sans stood awkwardly next to the table, occasionally glancing at Mettaton's face.

"It's congealed oil," Alphys took out a cloth and began wiping the oil off of her friend. "That 'throwing up' he did was probably caused by the oil breaching his voice-box." She explained. "He p-produces a special lubricant to k-keep himself from rusting. It normally is m-made in smaller amounts... a-and is supposed to be pink... and n-not thick." Sans nodded, taking note that Mettaton was a "self-lubricating robot."

"He's full of a nano-virus," Alphys sighed, "It's basically d-doing the robot equivalent to a h-human influenza: c-causing him to produce too much oil, clogging up his w-wires and making him overheat." She popped open Mettaton's chest and worked on cleaning him off.

"So, he'll be okay?" Sans waited for her response to relax. He came to terms with the fact that he was beginning to like Mettaton- a lot.

"He's n-not out of b-battery power right now, so he sh-should be online and f-functional." Alphys started working faster, her voice trembling.

Sans stared at Mettaton's closed eye, mentally willing it to open. He nearly jumped out of his shorts when his phone went off.

"I'll let you get to work, I'll be outside if you need me." Sans took his phone out as he slowly made his way out of Alphys's new lab. Papyrus was calling him.

"Hey Pap," Sans kept an even, calm tone.

"SANS! I WAS JUST AT UNDYNE'S TO MAKE SOME FRIENDSHIP SPAGHETTI. THEN I CAME HOME AND YOU WERE NOT THERE TO TASTE OUR CREATION. NOW I AM CALLING YOU TO ASK WHERE YOU ARE AND IF YOU ARE IN NEED OF A SNACK. PREFERABLY A PASTA PROCURED BY YOUR POPULAR PAPYRUS! NYEH HEH!" Papyrus sounded proud of his alliteration.

"I'll eat it when I come back home, okay, Papyrus? I'm a little busy right now." Sans didn't want Papyrus to know where he was, then he might try to join him.

"THAT IS FINE. I LEFT SOME OF IT IN THE REFRIGERATOR FOR YOU. I AM ON MY WAY TO ALPHYS'S TO DELIVER HER A SAMPLE, AS UNDYNE REQUESTED."

"Can't, uh, can't Undyne do it?" Sans went rigid.

"SHE IS ON HER WAY TO A HUMAN GYM. I DO NOT KNOW WHO THIS 'GYM' PERSON IS, BUT SHE VISITS THEM FREQUENTLY." Papyrus pondered.

Sans heard Papyrus's voice in the distance as well as on his phone.

"I SEE ANOTHER SKELETON IS ALREADY AS ALPHYS'S. OH! THAT'S YOU, SANS! HELLO!" Papyrus waved the hand with the phone.

Sans hung up and put his cell in his pocket.

"YOU KNOW IT IS RUDE TO HANG UP WITHOUT SAYING 'GOODBYE' YOU KNOW." Papyrus reprimanded him, putting his own phone away.

"Ah, sorry bro. I won't forget next time." Sans put on his best grin and stood as nonchalantly as possible.

"GOOD. NOW, IF YOU WILL STEP OUT OF THE WAY, I SHALL DELIVER THE FRIENDSHIP PASTA TO ALPHYS." Papyrus waited patiently for his brother to move.

Sans continued to stand there. He knew he was starting to sweat. "Why don't I do it for you?"

"THAT IS A VERY KIND GESTURE, HOWEVER, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WAS THE ONE UNDYNE ASKED TO BE THE DELIVERYSKELETON." Papyrus put his gloved hand to his chest.

"Sound logic there, bro." Sans's shoulders slumped. He wondered if Alphys was done yet.

"THIS PASTA CAN ONLY STAY WARM FOR SO LONG! IT IS BEST EATEN WHEN HOT, BUT THE COLD AIR HAS CHILLED IT A LITTLE. THE SOONER THIS PLATE GETS TO ALPHYS, THE BETTER." Papyrus gently nudged Sans to the side with a bony hip and marched past him. Sans scurried in behind him and quickly walked in front of him.

"Why don't you start looking for her over here. I'll go look that way." Sans announced, hopefully loud enough for Alphys to hear.

"WONDERFUL IDEA, BROTHER." Papyrus strutted over in the opposite direction that Sans walked in.

 

"Sans, w-was that your brother? Papyrus is h-here?" Alphys noticed the skeleton as soon as he entered the room. Sans nodded. Alphys turned back to Mettaton. The robot was propped up against the wall in a sitting position. He had a charging cable sticking out of his back that was plugged in. His chest was open and its wires were connected to a nearby computer. He appeared to be cleaned of the oil stuff.

"How's our robot doing?" Sans patted Mettaton's leg and looked to Alphys.

"He's, uh, t-temporarily shut down f-from overheating earlier. Luckily, nothing was damaged f-from the heat or the oil," Alphys cracked a nervous smile but it fell as soon as it appeared, "However, his logic processor was fried. It has been for a week."

"That explains the free stuff," Sans grimaced. Was that extra kindness to Papyrus also caused by the virus?

Alphys nodded, "But, d-don't worry! It's been fixed a-and I'm running some anti-virus procedures on him."

"SANS, I COULD NOT FIND HER- OH! THERE SHE IS. SANS, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU FOUND HER? YOU LAZYBONES." Papyrus appeared in the doorway.

Sans winced and turned around. "Sorry," he shrugged and glanced at Alphys.

Papyrus entered the room and handed Alphys the plate of spaghetti, "FROM UNDYNE AND MYSELF, WITH LOVE AND PLATONIC FRIENDSHIP RESPECTIVELY."

Alphys accepted the plate, nervous and bewildered.

"AH, METTATON, I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE." Papyrus greeted him. The skeleton did a double-take and stared at the glambot.

Sans rarely got to see that level of concern on his brother's face.


	5. More like "None-o Virus"

Seconds felt like minutes dragging by as Papyrus took in the sight before him. The clock on the wall sounded like a drum rattling in Sans's skull as the seconds ticked by. He wished someone would say something.

"IS HE... SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE THAT?" Papyrus pointed to the wires coming out of Mettaton's chest.

"H-he, uh, was feeling sick. S-so I'm just f-fixing him. He should be fine i-in a minute or two!" Alphys assured him. She set the spaghetti down to type a few things into the computer.

Papyrus looked over at his brother, he didn't look entirely convinced. Papyrus was a sweet, naive skeleton who could be easily fooled- by certain things. He wasn't stupid and he could tell something was clearly wrong with the robostar.

Sans grinned and winked, "She's right, Pap. Trust that the doc is doing her best."

"OF COURSE! ALPHYS IS THE BEST SCIENTIST I HAVE EVER MET. SHE IS THE _ONLY_ SCIENTIST I HAVE EVER MET, BUT THAT DOES NOT DEMEAN HER STATUS." Papyrus flashed her a smile. Her yellow cheeks tinted pink.

Sans didn't really want to leave Papyrus in there, but the room was suddenly getting stuffy and he had to slip out for a bit. Papyrus noticed him leave, but he had other priorities at the moment.

 

"YOU SAID HE WAS FEELING SICK. CAN ROBOTS ACTUALLY FEEL SICK?" Papyrus cautiously stepped toward Mettaton's sitting form.

"This one can. He caught a virus f-from one of his shows and refused t-treatment." Alphys decided not to stretch the truth this time. "T-that's how he ended up like this." She gave a shaky sigh and began removing wires from the computer.

Papyrus inched over until he was standing out of Alphys's way- next to Mettaton. She briefly glanced at the skeleton as she worked on putting Mettaton's insides back in place. Papyrus remained uncharacteristically silent to allow Alphys to concentrate. His silence actually made her worry and her hands began shaking.

"H-hey, Papyrus, why don't you tell me how y-you and Undyne made the, uh, Fr-Friendship Pasta?" She smiled at him expectantly.

"ABSOLUTELY! FIRST, WE BEGAN BY CREATING THE SAUCE..." Papyrus was happy to regale the scientist with his spaghetti story. The entire time he spoke, he slowly crept his hand over to Mettaton's and held it in his firm yet gentle grasp.

Alphys finished before Papyrus was done talking, but that was likely because he got distracted and began talking about puzzles before remembering his original story.

"... THE HOUSE REMAINED STANDING DESPITE THE FIRE SHOOTING OUT OF THE STOVE-" Papyrus's story was cut short again when he felt Mettaton move beside him.

Alphys eagerly jumped up from her computer chair, where she sat for fifteen minutes as Papyrus talked, and shuffled over to their friend. She eyed him carefully to make sure he was activating properly.

Mettaton's visible eye fluttered open and he sat up. He blinked a few times and looked around the room. He put a hand to his head and noticed that his other hand was not following suit. It was heavy. And it was being squeezed. Papyrus was holding his hand with both of his. And it was adorable.

"Papyrus, darling, it's good to see you again. Oh, and you as well, Dr. Alphys." He greeted them. Seconds later he was being hugged by both monsters.

"Next t-time you get sick, see me immediately!" Alphys smiled through her reprimand.

"AND ME! IF I KNEW YOU WERE SICK, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WOULD HAVE MADE YOU 'GET-WELL-SOON SPAGHETTI.'" Papyrus attempted to hide his relief by hugging Mettaton harder.

"Oh my! I didn't know you cared so much." Mettaton relished the attention, as he was wont to do.

"YOU ARE OUR FRIEND! WHY WOULD WE NOT CARE?" Papyrus and Alphys backed off to give him some room.

Mettaton smiled sweetly was opened his mouth to respond when he abruptly jolted upright and looked surprised.

"Sans! Where is he?" Mettaton scanned the room and found no sign of the shorter skeleton.

 

Sans was standing just outside the room. He didn't have the heart to leave the lab, and he couldn't be in the same room with those two. He just couldn't bear it for some reason. He wasn't sure if he wanted Papyrus to stay away from Mettaton or vice versa. Sans had no idea what to think of the two as an item. Admittedly, they weren't in a relationship. Papyrus was being his usual goofy self and Mettaton flirts with everyone... and his brain was fried from robot fever or whatever. And he already came to terms with the fact that he was fond of Mettaton and he found the robot to be quite attractive. He wasn't _jealous_ of Papyrus. No. He didn't want Mettaton to himself. Sans was beginning to feel like a tsunderplane.

He bristled when he heard Mettaton's voice. It meant he was okay, thankfully, but it also meant he was back to being his own narcissistic self.

When he heard his name spill out of Mettaton's mouth, he bristled so hard he felt his jacket poof up. He thought that he had some explaining to do, so he turned the corner and re-entered the room.

"Sup?" He gave a short wave and shoved his hand back in his pocket.

"There you are, dear!" Mettaton perked up and leaned forward. "I just wanted to thank you for visiting me." He looked to the side, "If you didn't, I would probably be on the floor, spilling oil on the expensive tile. Oh, and dying."

"YOU PAID METTATON A VISIT? AND YOU SAVED HIS LIFE? WAS THAT A DATE!?" Papyrus turned to face his brother.

Was Papyrus holding Mettaton's hand? Yes he was. This bothered Sans deeply.

Mettaton spoke before Sans could, "Yes, he came to take some of the goodies given to me from my fans."

"AHA! I KNEW YOU WERE JEALOUS THAT I RECEIVED A GIFT AND YOU DID NOT! I AM SO SORRY, BROTHER." Papyrus released Mettaton's hand.

Mettaton patted Papyrus's chest, "Oh, no, Papyrus. Sans said your gift was lost and he was coming by to pick up another. You have such a sweet brother."

"I would like to point out that it was not a date," Sans shrunk slightly into his jacket.

Alphys, who had been watching everything transpire, was enjoying herself tremendously. Sans nudged her with his elbow.

"R-right! It can't be a date unless it ends with a c-confession or a smooch," Alphys added.

"I SUPPOSE THAT IS CORRECT. IT IS IN THE HANDBOOK AFTER ALL." Papyrus stated proudly. He had memorized the dating handbook after his "date" with Frisk and was rather proud of himself. "SO, SANS, I GUESS IT DID NOT END WITH EITHER OF THOSE?"

Sans shrugged, "It ended with me carrying his unconscious body all the way over here. Sparks didn't really fly between us. It was a real showstopper. A-"

"SANS!"

Alphys chuckled at the skeletons' antics. She then remembered something and turned to Mettaton, "You do know how you fell ill, right?"

"I'm not entirely sure, darling. Care to tell me?" Mettaton turned on the table and struck a listening pose.

"According to the information I've gathered f-from Sans, you've been infected by the flowers s-some of your fans are giving you. Someone has p-purposefully set a nano-virus in the petals of the r-roses you have." Alphys explained. "I've analyzed the ones I found in your b-body and I d-discovered their purpose and their m-manufacturer."

Sans and Papyrus listened closely, their curiosities piqued.

Alphys swallowed thickly, "They were intended t-to gum up your limbs so you c-couldn't move and destroy your sense of reason- by m-means of overheating."

"So they didn't try to kill him?" Sans cocked his head to the side.

Alphys shook her head, "No. This p-primitive human technology was m-modified poorly and accidentally started gumming up his c-core instead of his extremities."

"You're saying that they didn't want to kill me, just to immobilize me and change the way I think?" Mettaton reiterated.

"Yes. I think they m-might have wanted to k-kidnap you," Alphys wrung her hands close to her chest.

"That makes sense. Who doesn't want their own Mettaton? Oh! That is a wonderful idea for my next product!" Mettaton grinned.

"You're going t-to be feeling a little weak. I had to replace a f-few things and your body is going to t-take a bit to recover. A-and I want to make sure you're completely clean, so I'm going to have to monitor you closely. You're p-probably going to... have to... ca-cancel your new episodes for a week... or two," Alphys smiled nervously.

"What!? Oh no, Alphys, I can't do that to my fans! What will happen to my ratings if I'm not making new episodes of any of my series?" Mettaton switched to a begging pose.

"J-just announce you're on hiatus! When you c-come back, the ratings will skyrocket b-because they, uh, missed you so much!" Alphys glanced at the skeletons for backup.

"NEVER HAS A TRUER TRUTH BEEN SPOKEN." Papyrus piped up.

Sans nodded.

Mettaton mulled this over in his head and soon looked defeated, "I shall agree to remain here. But I require company. I refuse to suffer in solitude."

"OH! I SHALL DO IT! I AM AN EXCELLENT CARETAKER!" Papyrus jumped- literally - at the opportunity.

Sans was going to regret this, "It'll give me something to do, I'm game."

"O-oh! If I knew you were going to volunteer- uh, would it be alright if Mettaton s-stayed with you? I don't really h-have to monitor him all day. J-just a thorough examination every day sh-should suffice." Alphys laughed nervously, "In reality, I'm very busy. But I-"

"Enjoy your anime, Alphys, we'll take the robot." Sans smirked.

 


	6. Are We Having Pun Yet?

It came as a surprise to Sans that Mettaton didn't take much with him for his stay. He expected Mettaton to bring a truckload of accessories... or glitter. Instead, Mettaton brought his battery charging cord, a hairbrush, and one of his cousin's CD's. Sans didn't have a problem with this. It meant he didn't have to carry anything. Papyrus seemed to be much more enthusiastic about the situation. He walked a few steps ahead of Sans and Mettaton and was too excited to slow down. Mettaton, _the_ Mettaton, was about to stay at his house! How could he not be excited? Sans slid his gaze to the side to view the robot walking next to him. He appeared uncomfortable. Sans was about to look ahead of himself again, not really feeling like asking what was wrong, but Mettaton turned his head and looked back at him expectantly. _"C'mon, Sans, he caught you staring, now you gotta say something."_ Sans urged himself to speak. 

"Feelin' okay?" Sans tried to look nonchalant.

"I feel better than I did, but I'm rather dizzy. And cold. How far is your house?" Mettaton slumped forward before righting himself.

Papyrus turned around, but continued to walk backwards, "NOT TOO MUCH FARTHER! BUT WE MUST HURRY, IT IS GETTING DARK."

"It shouldn't be. It's barely evening." Mettaton's voice had the smallest hint of whining in it.

"Clouds guys, it's the clouds. It's probably gonna snow." Sans grinned, "But that's _snow_ problem for us, right Pap?"

Papyrus turned back around without a word.

"What? Don't give me the _cold_ shoulder. _Icy_ you smiling." Sans glanced at Mettaton to see his reaction.

"Papyrus, don't be so sternum. He's just being humerus." Mettaton replied- though he looked like it pained him to say that.

 _"This relationship might have a chance."_ Sans thought giddily. 

"I AM REGRETTING MY DECISION TO BECOME YOUR CARETAKER." Papyrus shouted and began walking faster.

Sans chuckled and gently elbowed Mettaton's leg, "Thanks for backing me up."

"Don't expect that ever again... though it was kind of fun." Mettaton smirked.

\---

Sans relaxed on the couch as Papyrus gave Mettaton a tour of their house. He didn't bother turning on the TV because Mettaton probably would want to watch his reruns if it was on. There was only so much Mettaton one could stand.

Papyrus came practically skipping downstairs with Mettaton in tow. "SANS, WE MUST ADDRESS A VERY SERIOUS ISSUE!"

"Sup?" Sans barely rotated his head to look behind him, maintaining his cool demeanor.

"WE DO NOT HAVE A GUEST ROOM. METTATON NEEDS TO SLEEP SOMEWHERE. I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM WILLING TO GIVE UP MY SUPER COOL RACE-CAR BED, BUT I WANTED TO CHECK WITH YOU FIRST." Papyrus poked the couch. Sans has been falling asleep on the couch more than his own bed lately. But his bed was a mess: it hadn't been made since they got the house and it was covered with ketchup stains. If Papyrus gave his bed to Mettaton, he was probably going to stay on the couch and Sans would have to actually use his bed.

"I'm fine with sharing." Mettaton stepped up beside Papyrus, placing his hand on the skeleton's shoulder.

"I HADN'T THOUGHT OF THAT. I'M CERTAIN THERE IS ROOM FOR A PASSENGER IN MY BED. I CAN'T BLAME YOU. THE RACE-CAR MOTIF IS TOO RAD TO NOT WANT TO SLEEP IN. NYEH HEH HEH!" Papyrus put his hands on his hips to laugh heartily.

Sans was instantly suspicious again, "How about- Mettaton sleeps on the couch?"

Mettaton looked appalled for a moment, but remembered his manners. "I am a guest after all. I guess it's customary to have the sickly, extremely attractive guest sleep on the couch." Mettaton batted his eyelashes at Sans.

Sans snorted. _"I see how it is."_

"THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE SOMETHING A GOOD HOST WOULD DO. METTATON, YOU CAN SLEEP IN MY ROOM. I, THE GREAT AND GENEROUS PAPYRUS, SHALL USE THE COUCH." Papyrus announced.

Mettaton took Papyrus's hand in his and gave it a good pat, "You're too kind."

How the hell was Sans going to put up with a _week_ of this?

Sans didn't actually have to "put up with" it at all. In fact, Mettaton proved himself to be a very pleasant guest. But he spent most of his time up in Papyrus's room-with Papyrus. Sans could hear his brother loud and clear from anywhere in the house, so he wasn't really all that worried any more. Sans wasn't sure how _Mettaton_ was dealing with listening to Papyrus's and his spaghetti/royal guard stories.

\---

Later that night, Sans went up and pressed the side of his skull to Papyrus's door. He wanted to hear what Mettaton had to say to his brother when they were alone and the robot was too quiet to hear elsewhere. He had to wait a while first; Papyrus was talking.

Sans soon grew tired of waiting and cracked open the door just wide enough so he could see. Mettaton was laying on his stomach on Papyrus's bed; he was covered up to the top of his head with the sheets. He was resting a hand under his chin as he smiled and watched Papyrus talk about his interests. Papyrus was sitting on the floor next to his bed, retelling his story of meeting Frisk.

Papyrus paused in his storytelling and squirmed uncomfortably. "YOU HAVE BEEN STARING AT ME LIKE THAT ALL NIGHT. IS THERE SOMETHING IN MY TEETH?"

Mettaton snickered, "Oh no, dear. You're just pleasant to listen to. You are so... enthusiastic and full of passion. You're passionate about everything and I love that about you, darling."

A reddish blush painted itself on Papyrus's cheekbones. "O-OF COURSE! THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS ALWAYS PASSIONATE, NYEH HEH."

Mettaton grinned, "You are such a cutie."

"I... YOU THINK I-"

"I'm terribly sorry, but I think I need to charge for tonight. I'm dreadfully low on battery." Mettaton drooped, exemplifying his need for "sleep."

"YES! RIGHT! YOU LEFT YOUR THINGS IN THE LIVING ROOM, ALLOW ME TO GET THEM FOR YOU!" Papyrus sprung up and jogged towards the door.

Sans stepped back and allowed his brother to exit.

"OH, HELLO, SANS!" Papyrus waved upon seeing him and carried on his way.

Sans wanted to poke his head in Papyrus's room and warn Mettaton about flirting with his brother, but... he just couldn't. He wasn't that kind of person. Papyrus could make his own decisions and if he decided to be with Mettaton, so be it. He wanted to have a go at getting to know him- maybe get close enough for a sensual hand-holding session. But he really didn't want to compete with his brother for Mettaton's affection. Plus, they really seemed to fit well together and Sans didn't want to interfere. Sans sighed and turned to trudge into his room.

A sudden voice startled him out of his movements, "Sans?"

Sans stiffened. How in the hell did the robot move so quietly. He turned to face him.

Mettaton crouched to be more at face-level with the skeleton, "I was going to tell Papyrus he had already brought my things into his room hours ago, but you look a little blue. Anything I can do?"

Sans grinned out of irony, "Heh. Not really. But I-" Mettaton leaned forward and kissed his forehead.

Mettaton stood up, patted Sans's head with a smile, and sauntered back into Papyrus's room.

Papyrus returned, "I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT HIS THINGS WERE ALREADY UP HERE. I FEEL SILLY." He peeked into his room and told Mettaton goodnight.

"Me too Pap, me too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even if you don't like hearing puns, it's at least a little fun to make them.  
> I, however, love puns. I just don't make them very well.


	7. No Business like Snowbusiness

When Sans awoke, it was still dark in his room. He checked his phone for the time. The light nearly blinded him, but after a moment he could make out the first digit- three. He knew he didn't feel like he got a sufficient amount of sleep. He was very compelled to return to his dreams, however, something was goading him to get up and walk around. Grumbling quietly, he slid off his mattress and made his way out of his room. He sneaked a peek in Papyrus's room. Unable to sleep on his back, Mettaton lay on his side with his arms wrapped around the pillow he was resting his head on. A faint pink light was emanating from underneath the sheets. That was probably his charging cable. Or that weird "core" thing he had. _"Don't go in there, Sans. Don't do it. Don't look at him. Don't-"_ Sans was already on his way into his brother's room, despite the nagging voice in his head-that was his own.

 _"Do robots even need to sleep?"_ Sans asked himself. Mettaton appeared to be sleeping. His eye was shut and some sort of breathing sound was coming from him. Sans knew sleep pretty well and that classified as sleep. This made Sans feel a little better about slowly peeling back the sheets to take a look at the robot. This was creepy. Too creepy. But Mettaton was so interesting.

Sans confirmed that the pink glow was coming from Mettaton's heart-shaped core. He peered at it. Frisk mentioned that Mettaton could remove it voluntarily and it was electrically charged. Sans poked a bony finger to the glass casing over the core. Mettaton stirred in his sleep- mumbling something ending with "darling"- and Sans jumped back. He decided he was in dangerous territory and carefully placed the covers back over the robot and backed out of the room.

If Sans had a heart, it would be beating out of his rib-cage. He could use a good bottle of ketchup right now to calm his nerves. He quietly stepped downstairs and headed for the kitchen. On his way, he stopped by the living room to check on Papyrus. Papyrus was snoring enthusiastically under a quilt. Sans wondered how someone could snore enthusiastically. Sans pet his brother on the shoulder and pulled the quilt up over his neck and carried on his way. He was more prepared for the fridge-light and quickly grabbed a bottle of ketchup. He almost shut the door, but he caught sight of a plate of spaghetti, pushed away from the others.

It had a sticky-note on it that said, "THIS PLATE OF FRIENDSHIP SPAGHETTI IS SPECIFICALLY FOR SANS. - THE GREAT PAPYRUS"

Sans shoved a handful of the pasta into his mouth and washed it down with the condiment, shutting the fridge door as well. He shuddered at the taste but it wasn't terrible. Papyrus was getting better. Sans had to tell him he was proud of him later.

He carried his beverage? over to the the living room and stood in front of a window. He put a hand to the glass and looked outside. He was right, it was snowing.

He began to wonder how Mettaton would deal with snow. He hadn't ever seen him in Snowdin. In fact, Mettaton preferred Hotland. Maybe he would freeze up in cold weather. He could apparently feel the cold, as evidenced by his earlier complaint. Sans would just have to find out.

\---

Sans didn't have to wait that long to get Mettaton outside.

Some time in the afternoon, Undyne came over to their house with Frisk and the Monster Kid and challenged Papyrus to a snowball fight. Not one to back down from a challenge, Papyrus accepted and recruited Sans and Mettaton to be on his team.

"You think you have an advantage because I only have kids on my team?" Undyne scoffed, furiously building their team's snowfort. "I'll have you know, Frisk is the champion at dodging!"

Frisk gently patted their side of the fort and shot the other team a sweet smile.

"And you know the rules, don't you!? The team who gets pelted with the most snowballs loses!" Undyne clenched her fist. "You hear that, brats, don't get hit!"

Sans was seriously questioning the logic behind having Monster Kid in a snowball fight. You have to _throw_ snowballs. Kid didn't have arms.

Mettaton asked for him, "Um, how is this fair for your team? One of your members is lacking... vital elements."

"Don't be so stupid, _I'll_ be throwing enough for all three of us! NGAHHH!" Undyne suplexed her fort, causing them to start over.

The actual snowball fight didn't last long. Sans didn't even bother throwing. He kept his hands in his pockets and dodged repeatedly. Undyne believed ducking was a sign of weakness, so she was soaking wet by the time they called it quits. Mettaton didn't really feel up to playing, so he sat on the porch and watched. Kid just wanted to make a snowman, so they sat next to the robot in awe. It wasn't every day you saw a TV star. Frisk was decked in the face once and that was the end of the snowball fight. If Frisk went home with a black eye, Toriel would spare none of them mercy.

Frisk assured everyone they were fine and tugged Kid off to the side to make a snowman. There was plenty of snow for them to use, as it was still coming down steadily.

Papyrus went inside to make everyone some fresh spaghetti.

Sans, Undyne, and Mettaton sat on the front steps and watched the kids frolic.

"I'm surprised to see you here, Mettaton." Undyne squinted at the robot, looking him over.

"I am staying here to recover as per Dr. Alphys's orders." Mettaton responded. "She prescribed me a dose of skeleton brothers."

Undyne was going to ask something else, but figured she could just ask Alphys. "It's, uh, rare to see you two sitting so close. Actually, it's rare to see you sitting close to anyone, Mettaton."

Mettaton looped an arm around Sans's shoulders, "Can you really blame me? Just look at him. Cute as a button."

Undyne smirked, "It looks like he's internally screaming."

"Oh." Mettaton put his hands in his lap and scooted an inch away.

When Undyne was finished laughing at the robot's expense she stood up, "I think it's about time I take Kid home. Can't leave 'em out in the cold for too long, y'know."

Papyrus burst out the front door, "UNDYNE! WAIT! TAKE SOME SPAGHETTI WITH YOU. IT WILL KEEP YOU WARM FOR THE WALK."

While Papyrus gifted Undyne and Monster Kid plates of spaghetti, Mettaton rose from his spot and slipped inside.

Frisk crunched through the snow towards Sans and hopped up the stairs to meet him. They smiled at him expectantly.

Sans looked up at them from his sitting position, "Heya kid. I suppose you're wondering how the robot is doing?"

Frisk nodded and held their hand out, offering to help him up. Sans took their hand, but got up on his own.

"He's fine. Alphys fixed the problem. She wants to keep him from working. Until he's completely better at least. So he's staying with us." Sans put his hands back in his pockets.

There were some holes in that sentence that Sans didn't feel like filling.

Frisk nodded understandingly and smiled. They pointed at the door then to the skeleton.

"You want me to go inside?" Sans opened the door.

Frisk shrugged, not their point then, but ambled inside anyway. Sans followed them, glancing at his brother and Undyne before he shut the door.

"So, what is it that you wanted?" Sans cocked his head to the side.

"How do you feel about Mettaton?" Frisk asked, voice just as small as they were.

"He's not an asshole like I thought he was. Uh, don't tell Toriel I said that." Sans grinned-wider than he already was.

Frisk giggled and nodded. However, they didn't look satisfied with the reply.

Sans sighed and slipped a hand out of his pocket to rub the back of his skull, "Well, he's... actually pretty decent. And he's much nicer to Papyrus than I thought he would be." Sans looked down at Frisk's expression to see if they were satiated yet. Apparently not. They nudged his belly with a mitten-clad hand, urging him to say something else.

"I guess he's cool. Whaddya want from me?" Sans chuckled.

"If by 'cool' you mean 'drop-dead gorgeous', I completely agree." Mettaton smirked, looming over Sans from behind.

Sans looked up, meeting Mettaton's gaze. He reflexively jumped and turned around. "Yeah, sure, why not?" He tried to play it as cool as possible.

"H-how long were you, uh, listening?" Sans was beginning to feel like a jerk.

"Just that last part, darling. Why? Is there something you didn't want me to hear?" Mettaton raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, no. NO. No." Sans had never been this un-smooth in his life.

Mettaton snickered, but said nothing in reply.

Frisk tapped on Mettaton's leg to get his attention. They raised their arms and made a grabby motion with their hands. Mettaton happily scooped them up.

Papyrus returned from outside, covered in snow. "THE SNOW IS GETTING AGGRESSIVE. PERHAPS I SHOULD ESCORT FRISK HOME NOW?"

Frisk made a pouty face, but nodded. Before Mettaton put them back down, they whispered something into his ear.

Apparently it was hilarious because the robot burst into a fit of laughter. He nearly dropped the child he was laughing so hard.

He calmed down and set Frisk on the floor, still giggling slightly. "Y-yes, alright. I'll make certain to do that."

Frisk seemed very satisfied with their work. They tugged on Sans's jacket and pointed at the door.

"Oh, you want me to take you home? Sorry, Pap." Sans removed his hand from his jacket and let Frisk hold it. He knew Frisk would be better off if he used a shortcut to Toriel's. If the snow was as "aggressive" as Papyrus said anyway.

"THAT IS FINE WITH ME. WHILE YOU ARE GONE, I AM GOING TO SET UP FOR MOVIE NIGHT! METTATON CAN HELP." Papyrus giddily clenched his fists in anticipation.

Frisk waved goodbye as they left with Sans.

Mettaton didn't know how long Sans would be gone, but he was going to _not be there_ for a bit- leaving him alone with Papyrus. He saw this as his chance to say a few things.


	8. Punishment

It was a quick trip from Sans and Papyrus's to Toriel's- made even quicker with the use of a shortcut. Sans and Frisk waved their goodbyes as they parted ways at the door.

He didn't want to return home immediately, no, that could be suspicious. While he was out, he figured he might as well make a few visits. His first stop was Alphys's.

She was startled to see him, as always, but she welcomed him into her home/lab.

"So, what brings you h-here, Sans?" She asked, scuffling back to her computer chair.

Sans stood next to her and leaned over her shoulder. "I was hoping you could tell me who modified those nanobots into a virus. It's fine if you can't."

"A-actually, I do know. I sent Undyne over to the m-manufacturers and she 'persuaded' them into giving her the information." Alphys smiled, delighted she could help.

Sans smirked, "Great. Would you like to give _me_ their info.?"

Alphys narrowed her eyes, "You're not planning on doing something stupid, are you?"

"Of course not. C'mon, Al, when have I ever done something stupid?" Sans put his hands up.

Alphys looked unimpressed and turned to her computer. She brought up the information and showed it to the skeleton. Sans wasn't all that shocked. It was just a group of human males who had previously been in trouble for pestering their monster neighbors. And by pestering, it meant "sending death threats."

"I, uh, did a little more research on them and f-found that they were planning to robonap Mettaton and..." Alphys glanced to the side and carried on with a different sentence. "It would make sense b-because he's a beloved idol of us monsters. And if they did s-something to him, maybe we would get scared enough to go back to Mt. Ebott."

Sans took in her words and nodded, "Thanks, Al. I owe ya. Oh, and Undyne too." He patted her on the back and headed for the door. "And, uh, Mettaton's doing fine. So don't worry about him." He winked at the scientist before exiting.

Sans made his way into the city. He knew a few humans who were about to have a bad time.

\---

"HOW ABOUT THIS ONE, METTATON?" Papyrus held up another movie for the robot to judge. Mettaton took the case and looked at the cover.

"Papy, darling, this is a cooking series from television, not a movie." Mettaton gave the skeleton a sympathetic smile.

"BUT IT IS IN THE SAME TYPE OF BOX AS THE MOVIES." Papyrus snatched the case out of Mettaton's hands and peered at it closely. "HM. I SUPPOSE YOU'RE RIGHT... CAN WE STILL WATCH IT?" He looked up at Mettaton hopefully.

"Why not?" Mettaton sighed and flopped onto the couch. He lazily wrapped himself with one of the blankets Papyrus had placed there. The entire couch was covered in blankets and pillows for "movie night."

Mettaton was a bit exhausted. He had been trying for the past ten minutes to ask Papyrus on a date, but Papyrus was too excited to listen. He gave up for the time being and decided to try again later.

Papyrus gleefully put in the "movie" and hopped onto the couch next to his guest.

Unsurprisingly, Papyrus was the type of guy who says, "this is the best part," every few minutes. Needless to say, it was driving Mettaton ever so slightly crazy. In the bad way.

"Papyrus," Mettaton grabbed Papyrus's hand, "I understand that you enjoy this very, very much, but could you..." Mettaton was distracted momentarily by the happenings onscreen. "Did that woman just put caviar in the cake batter?"

"I BELIEVE SO. IS THAT NOT HOW YOU MAKE A CAKE?" Papyrus looked confused.

Mettaton froze, squeezing Papyrus's hand a little too hard for the skeleton's liking. "Papy, sweety, do you _only_ know how to make spaghetti?"

Papyrus nodded. "IS THIS A PROBLEM? SPAGHETTI IS THE KING OF FOODS."

Mettaton reached over and paused the show. "As a handsome robot who has his own cooking show, I know how to make a thing or two. Would you like me to expand your cooking prowess?"

Papyrus spoke after a brief moment of deliberation, "YES." He glanced at his hand, "WILL YOU BE HOLDING MY HAND LIKE THIS THE ENTIRE TIME? I DON'T MIND, BUT IT KIND OF HURTS."

Mettaton instantly released his grip, "I'm sorry. Um, let us proceed to the kitchen."

 

"ALL YOU HAVE IS PASTA!" Mettaton had searched the entirety of the skeletons' kitchen and only found noodles and ingredients for pasta sauce. Plus a few bags of chips and condiments.

"THAT'S BECAUSE ALL I MAKE IS SPAGHETTI. I THOUGHT YOU KNEW THAT." Papyrus put his hands on his hips.

"Do you only eat spaghetti? Does _Sans_ only eat spaghetti?" Mettaton was becoming concerned for their health.

"WHAT? NO, OF COURSE NOT. EVERY SKELETON KNOWS TO BALANCE HIS DIET ACCORDINGLY. AS FOR SANS, HE PREFERS TO EAT AT RESTAURANTS FULL OF GREASE. DON'T GET ME WRONG, HE LOVES MY COOKING. HE TELLS ME SO ALL THE TIME! BUT SANS EATS WHAT HE WANTS." Papyrus shrugged.

Mettaton perked up, "It sounds like all you do is cook for yourself, Papy." He placed his fingertips on Papyrus's temple and slid them down to his chin. "When the storm lets up, why don't you let me treat you to dinner somewhere downtown?"

"OH BOY, REALLY?" Papyrus shuddered. "THAT SOUNDS EXCITING! WAIT. HOLD ON. ARE YOU ASKING ME ON A DATE?" Papyrus squinted.

"Indeed I am." Mettaton slowly retracted his hand.

"W-WOWIE! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HUMBLY ACCEPT. BUT ONLY BECAUSE IT WOULD BREAK _ANYONE'S_ HEART TO NOT BE DATING ME." Papyrus was trying hard to play it cool.

Mettaton chuckled and sighed contentedly. "Now then, shall we begin our cooking lesson?"

\---

Sans returned home much later than he anticipated. Before he even approached the door, he checked his phone. He set it to silent while he was taking care of business. There were a few missed calls and _so many_ texts from Papyrus. Most of them, to Sans's relief, were just telling him about what he and Mettaton were doing. The last few were asking if he was okay and where he was. He didn't bother checking the calls.

It had been steadily snowing the entire night and Sans was sure he looked like a short snowman by then. He shook himself off before finally going inside.

All of the lights were off and it was nearly as dark as it was outside. The only light was coming from the TV, allowing Sans to see the couch clearly. Mettaton was laying on his back with Papyrus resting on his chest. Papyrus had his phone clutched in his hand as he slept. Sans felt guilty for not responding and glared at his cell. He looked up again and realized Mettaton was staring directly at him.

Sans learned something new that night: Mettaton's arms can stretch. Mettaton reached over and grabbed the front of Sans's shirt from the couch and yanked him up close.

"We were so worried," Mettaton hissed in the quietest way he could.

"Sorry. After I walked Frisk home I visited Alphys. I forgot my phone was off until I was coming home." Sans was kind of telling the truth.

"I forgive you, but you really need to be apologizing to _him_." Mettaton let Sans go and pointed at Papyrus.

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry. I'll do it when he wakes up." Sans began shuffling away as subtly as possible.

Mettaton huffed in irritation, "You're going to do it _now_." He sat up and gently shook Papyrus awake. "Papy, wake up. Sans is home."

Papyrus wasn't that hard to wake up. "SANS!" He leaped off the couch and lifted his brother in a hug. "I THOUGHT YOU HAD GOTTEN LOST OR YOU HAD FALLEN ASLEEP AND TURNED INTO A SANSICLE!" Papyrus put Sans down and pretended he wasn't that emotional. "I MEAN, I'M GLAD YOU'RE HOME."

"Yeah, sorry about that, bro." Sans shifted uncomfortably. "I promise I won't do it again."

"GOOD! I THINK WE ALL DESERVE A GOOD NIGHT'S REST!" Papyrus stood upright. "OH, AND SANS, YOU'RE GROUNDED."

"Aw, c'mon, Pap, don't do this to me." Sans put his hands up in defense.

"I WILL AND I DID. AS THE TALLER BROTHER I GET TO MAKE THESE RULES. NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM. YOUR METTATON AND I SHALL DISCUSS YOUR PUNISHMENT." Papyrus pointed to the stairs.

"My _pun_ ishment?" Sans put his hands back in his pockets and headed up the stairs as Papyrus shouted at him for the godawful joke.

Mettaton stood and guided Papyrus back to the couch and gently pushed him onto it. "Papyrus, why don't you let me take care of him? Go ahead and get back to sleep. You deserve it, dear."

"ALRIGHT, BUT DON'T LET HIS PUNS DISTRACT YOU. IT'S HOW HE GETS OUT OF HIS REPRIMANDING." Papyrus raised a finger in warning.

"Understood." Mettaton nodded and headed up the stairs. This was going to be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like the idea of Mettaton being able to stretch his arms like a cartoony robot.


	9. Forecast

Sans's door was locked. Great. Mettaton knocked and called out in a singsong voice, "Oh Sans~! It's me, the astoundingly handsome robostar~! Why don't you open up so we can talk?"

"Only if you can tell a good knock knock joke," came Sans's reply.

"Let me rephrase," Mettaton kept up the cheerful tone, "Open the door or I kick it down."

There was a moment of silence before the door clicked open. Sans stood in the doorway, preventing Mettaton from entering. Mettaton peered over the short skeleton. It was black as night in his room, so he opted to focus on Sans.

Mettaton crouched to be at eye-level with him, "I've been appointed to discipline you by the taller brother." He smirked, sending a shiver down Sans's spine, "Shall we take this into your room, darling, or does the hallway satisfy you?"

Sans had no idea what Mettaton was implying, but whatever it was he didn't want Papyrus to see it. "My room's fine, I guess. Just warning you now, it's a little messy." Sans stepped to the side and flipped on the light.

Mettaton wasn't all that phased by the trash tornado in front of him- he had more interesting things in mind. He brushed past Sans and faced him. "You may want to shut the door, sweetheart."

 

Meanwhile, Papyrus was tossing around on the couch attempting to go back to sleep. He was relieved that Sans was home safe, so he should be able to rest easy, right? Nope. He was too excited because he remembered he had a date with Mettaton. He, the Great Papyrus, had a date with _Mettaton._ He was going to be dating a celebrity! Sans was going to be so proud of him.

Speaking of him, he should be receiving a series of puzzles by now. That's what Papyrus did when Sans misbehaved in the past. He forgot that Mettaton hated puzzles. In fact, he didn't even know that to begin with, so he couldn't have forgotten something he didn't know. Papyrus figured that the date was a wonderful opportunity to get to know Mettaton better. He liked Mettaton, he really did. It was rare to find someone so close to being as cool as the Great Papyrus.

Papyrus was shaken from his mellow thoughts by a very unfamiliar sound coming from upstairs. He slowly stood from the couch and tip-toed up the stairs. The noise got louder and more clear as he approached Sans's room. The sound was still muffled, as though someone was attempting to stifle it, but Papyrus realized what it was regardless. It was his brother-laughing like someone had told him the magnum opus of puns and pleading for Mettaton to stop.

Papyrus didn't want to be rude by not knocking, but his curiosity got the better of him and he cracked open Sans's door.

Sans was face-down on the floor with his head shoved into his sleeve to keep his raucous laughter in check. Mettaton sat on Sans's lower back, keeping him pinned there. His robotic arms had twisted around the skeleton and his oh so talented hands were mercilessly tickling the sensitive bones under his jacket. Sans's free hand flailed uselessly, unable to reach the robot and unable to free himself from his binds.

Papyrus felt safe enough to open the door the rest of the way and watch. It wasn't every day he got to see Sans give off so much energy. This ought to tire him out and teach him a lesson.

Mettaton looked to the doorway, "Oh, hello Papyrus. Sorry if we woke you." He steadied himself as Sans rolled in an attempt to throw him off. "Do you think this is an adequate punishment?"

"I SUPPOSE IT IS. BUT IT IS BEDTIME NOT PLAYTIME. ESPECIALLY FOR YOU TWO. YOU'RE ILL," he pointed to Mettaton, "AND YOU HAVE BEEN WALTZING AROUND IN THE SNOW ALL NIGHT," he pointed at Sans.

"Right as always, Papy," Mettaton smiled and nodded. He released Sans from his tickling wrath and stood up beside him. Sans remained where he was to catch his breath. He hadn't breathed that hard in this timeline for a while.

"OF COURSE I AM! THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS NEVER WRONG. NOW GET SOME REST. WE HAVE A BIG DAY TOMORROW- IF THE STORM LETS UP THAT IS." Papyrus rubbed his chin in thought.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sans panted, sitting up.

"METTATON IS TAKING ME DOWNTOWN FOR A DINNER DATE! ISN'T HE THE COOLEST? SECOND TO ME OF COURSE." Papyrus announced proudly.

The news hit Sans like a charging Greater Dog. "Oh. Cool. Yeah." He didn't know he looked so disappointed, so the other two caught on quickly. Papyrus and Mettaton shared concerned glances for a moment before grinning.

"Sans?" Mettaton placed a hand on Sans's shoulder. "Would you like to join us?"

Sans stared at Mettaton, searching for a hint of pity. He didn't want to be pitied. He wanted to accept the truth and get on with his life.

"I DON'T MIND SHARING." Papyrus shrugged, completely aware of his implications.

"I don't think a date would be nearly as entertaining without you, darling. You're so charismatic." Mettaton squeezed his shoulder.

Sans snorted. Him? Charismatic?

Mettaton leaned down and whispered seductively into his skull, "Don't worry about paying. It's on me."

"Well, when you put it that way, sure. Why not?" Sans shrugged and stood.

"HUZZAH! I CAN ALREADY FEEL OUR BONDS STRENGTHENING!" Papyrus cheered. "NOW, THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS OFF TO SLEEP." Papyrus spun on his heel and strutted away.

Sans waited until his brother was out of earshot before speaking. "Are you being serious, or is this a pity invitation?" Sans narrowed his eyes at the robot.

Mettaton smirked and trailed a finger down Sans's sternum, "What do you think, Sansy?"

Sans grabbed Mettaton's hand firmly, but gently. "C'mon. Mettaton. Tell me."

Mettaton sighed and knelt in front of him, "I was more certain of Papyrus's reciprocated feelings towards me. It took longer to figure out how you felt about me because for the longest time I thought you loathed me. I felt safer asking him on a date. However, that doesn't mean I like you any less, dear."

Sans raised an eyebrow, "So, you don't mind if Papyrus and I -for lack of a better term - share you?"

Mettaton smiled and shook his head, "Not at all." He brought Sans into a hug. "You're both fabulously wonderful. I like you both for who you are, and I like you both equally."

Sans was having some reservations about this, but he decided baby steps were better than none at all. "Alright, I believe you. So... what happens now?"

"Well," Mettaton stood upright, "we go to bed."

"Oh." Sans chuckled. How anticlimactic.

"You wanna join me?" Mettaton put his hands on his hips, smirking.

"Whoa there, bud. Doesn't that come after the date," Sans joked. "Sure. Skeletons are pretty cuddly, I don't blame ya." Sans followed Mettaton out of his room, shutting the lights off and closing the door before he left.

Mettaton was delighted at how cuddly Sans was and didn't hesitate to coil his arms around him. Sans was glad he didn't have lungs, otherwise he would have suffocated. 

Sans could tell Mettaton was asleep by the familiar sounds emanating from him. He found the noises to be very rhythmic and soothing. He struggled to roll over so he had his back to Mettaton's fuchsia core-light so it wouldn't keep him up. He hadn't been this cozy in a while and was asleep in minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just couldn't decide which ship to go with and, as per your lovely suggestions, I went with a little poly.  
> It's a bit confusing because two of them are related, so it's not the usual. But it's not unusual.  
> I think I have a few more chapters left in me before this fic is done.  
> But I'd like to say a little something here.  
> THANK YOU. Thank you so much. All of your comments have been so helpful and encouraging! And I've over here like I AM NOT WORTHY. But I'm super glad you're enjoying this because it gives me a reason to write it, y'know?


	10. Not Quite Date Night

Papyrus was excited the moment he awakened the next morning. He jogged over to a window and looked through the blinds. To his disappointment, it was still snowing. However, it wasn't snowing as badly as it was the night prior. Maybe he and Sans could still go on a date with Mettaton. Papyrus eagerly strode upstairs and stood in front of his door. He wasn't planning on waking Mettaton up, he just wanted to make sure he was getting his beauty rest. Robots needed that, right? Plus, Mettaton was still sick according to Alphys.

Papyrus remembered what it was like to be sick. Years ago, he had stayed out all night playing in the snow and Sans forgot to tell him to come back inside until it was way past his bed time. He remembered not being able to sleep much and that his bones ached when he got up in the mornings. Sans stopped being so lazy and actually helped him get better. Sans wasn't the best monster out there, but, by golly, he was a great brother when he needed to be.

He stopped reminiscing about the past and focused on his caretaker duties. He did promise Alphys that he and Sans would take care of her robot.

Papyrus slowly turned the doorknob and pushed the door open just a smidge. He focused his gaze on his still-totally-rad bed and became incredibly confused. Sans was in his bed, but Mettaton was nowhere to be found. He didn't blame Sans for wanting to sleep in a tidy bed instead of his own, but did he actually kick Mettaton out? No, of course not! Papyrus backed out of his room and checked every other place a robot could fit in in his house.

It was around the third time he checked the fridge that Papyrus realized Mettaton wasn't in the house. He was gone.

Papyrus barged back into his room and began shaking his brother. "SANS! WAKE UP IMMEDIATELY!"

Sans groaned and pulled the sheets over his head.

Papyrus grabbed the sheets and yanked them off the bed entirely, sending Sans spinning to the floor.

"Okay, I'm up. Or down, rather. Point is, I'm awake. Whatcha need?" Sans remained stationary and craned his neck to look up at Papyrus.

"I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHERE OUR GUEST IS." Papyrus tapped his foot in front of Sans's face.

"Huh?" Sans looked back at the bed. There was a severe lack of robot in it. Sans stood up, stretching. "I have no idea where he went, bro. Sorry."

"A LOT OF HELP YOU ARE. FIRST YOU STAY OUT ALL NIGHT WITHOUT TELLING ME A THING; THEN YOU SLEEP IN MY BED AND LOSE METTATON." Papyrus huffed.

Sans chuckled, "Right. My bad."

He walked to the door but Papyrus stopped him. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

"Going to find Mettaton. It's my fault we lost him, right?" Sans shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets.

Papyrus blinked. "OH. CARRY ON."

Sans grinned and shook his head as he left the room. He was nervous, but he wasn't going to show Papyrus that. It would only make things worse.

"AND TURN YOUR PHONE ON THIS TIME!" He heard Papyrus shout from upstairs.

Sans remembered his phone was still on silent. He turned the sound on and checked his unread messages. A few were from Toriel- mostly jokes and 'thank you's for taking Frisk home. There was also one from Alphys asking how Mettaton was. He decided to reply to that one. He told her Mettaton was "pretty chill." It was going to be a bad pun in horrible taste if Mettaton was actually frozen outside somewhere.

There was an almost immediate reply: Good. Could you check his vitals for me? It's not hard and he'll tell you how to do it.

Sans's response was a continuous mental "uhhh." But he typed out a "sure thing" and headed for the front door.

He had his hand on the knob when there was a powerful knock on the door. Sans hesitated before asking, "Who is it?"

"Sans, just open the door." Sans was relieved to hear that metallic voice come from the other side.

"'Sans, just open the door' who?" Sans smirked.

"I'm going to shove my foot up your pelvis." Mettaton was not having any of that nonsense.

Sans couldn't help but laugh. "I get it." He opened the door to let Mettaton in.

Mettaton brushed past him and shut the door with his heel. His arms were full of shopping bags- and snow.

"I decided to slip out while you two were sleeping and get you a few things. It was going to be a surprise." Mettaton dropped the bags on the floor and began brushing the snow off his metal body. He stopped, "Speaking of surprises, why are you up so early?"

"Papyrus woke up and flipped out because you were missing. I was about to go looking for you." Sans eyed the red and white bags on the floor. He was too preoccupied with that to anticipate the hug Mettaton gave him.

"Ooh! You two worry too much! But I appreciate the concern, darling." Mettaton pressed a freezing cold smooch on Sans's cheek.

Regardless of the icy metal touching him, Sans felt absolutely burning inside. Some of that might have been embarrassment from being lifted off the ground just for a hug.

Mettaton put Sans back down and turned to sift through the bags for what he got the skeleton. He did not make it to the bags before Papyrus dashed downstairs and tackled the robot in a hug. Mettaton didn't fall over or even lose balance- Papyrus weighed next to nothing being a skeleton and all.

"METTATON! HOW WONDERFUL IT IS TO SEE YOU NOT FROZEN TO DEATH! I SEE SANS SUCCEEDED AT FETCHING YOU. I AM SURPRISED AND PROUD OF YOU, BROTHER." Papyrus spoke from around Mettaton's shoulder.

Sans lifted his hand and offered a thumbs up, briefly followed by him rubbing the cold spot on his cheek affectionately.

Papyrus released his guest. "YOU MUST HAVE BEEN OUTSIDE FOR A WHILE, METTATON, YOU ARE QUITE COLD. AND SNOWY."

Mettaton caressed Papyrus's jaw and placed a sweet kiss on his cheekbone. "Yes, but I feel fantastic."

"So, what's in the bag, Metta?" Sans nudged one of said bags with a slipper-clad foot.

"I'm glad you asked, darling!" Mettaton practically slid over to his haul and shoved his hands in one of the bags. "I've already made reservations at a restaurant so there's no backing out now! It's not my usual level of extravagant, but I figured you two could appreciate its fine cuisine."

"And I'd like you two to dress for the occasion." Mettaton pulled out a spiffy-looking, light orange dress shirt, and a black tie and slacks. He handed them to Papyrus. "You can put this over your- er, 'battle body' was it?- if you like."

"I WOULDN'T EXPECT LESS OF YOU, METTATON! OF COURSE YOU KNOW ONE HAS TO WEAR CLOTHES FOR A DATE. BUT I KNEW THAT AS WELL, FOR I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM A DATING MASTER! NYEH HEH HEH!" Papyrus stood proudly with the clothes draped over his arm.

"... Right." Mettaton glanced to Sans for a moment. Sans winked at him.

"I knew Papy would wear anything fashionable, but I wasn't sure what to get you, Sans." Mettaton rambled as he lifted another dress shirt, this one blue with pinstripes, from the bag and handed it to Sans. "Do you like it?"

Sans wasn't too keen on wearing anything other than what he was at the moment. "Yeah, I like it." It wasn't a lie. He liked the way it looked. He just didn't think it would look good on _him._

"Wonderful!" Mettaton chirped and proceeded to hand Sans the rest of a suit. "Please, you two, try them on!" Mettaton splayed himself on the couch and waited.

Papyrus bounded up the stairs to his room, thrilled to impress his idol. Sans carried himself up the stairs much slower and much more nervously.

 

"Fabulous, fabulous, FABULOUS, darlings!" Mettaton put his hands to his cheeks in admiration. "Oh, you two look absolutely dashing!"

Papyrus joyfully stood next to his brother in front of Mettaton, feeling ten times as handsome as he already was. "WAS THERE EVER ANY DOUBT?"

"Of course not, but I never imagined just how _ravishing_ you could look." Mettaton purred. "So, how does it fit?"

Papyrus, much to Mettaton's delight, struck a few poses. "LIKE A GLOVE, WHICH I AM WEARING TWO OF."

"Yeah. It's um... they're fine. It's good." Sans smiled shyly.

"Wonderful. You can take them off now if you like. Just remember to put them back on before we go. The reservation is for six on the dot and it's barely even ten in the morning." Mettaton shooed them away with a hand movement.

\---

A few hours later, Sans remembered Alphys's request and left his room to find Mettaton. He completely forgot to check Mettaton's "vitals"- whatever that meant. He was glad Alphys was probably preoccupied with gorging herself on all of the new human animes she previously couldn't get her claws on. He didn't feel rushed, but he felt a bit guilty for forgetting.

He found Mettaton in the living room. The robot sat on the couch swaddled in several blankets with Papyrus next to him. They were watching a human romantic comedy. Papyrus seemed engrossed but from Mettaton's expression, Sans could tell it was horrible.

"Hey." Sans rest his arms on the back of the couch and fiddled with Mettaton's hair.

Mettaton turned to see him, "Yes, Sansy?"

"Alphys asked me to 'check your vitals.' Wanna come show me how to do that?" Sans jerked a thumb over to the kitchen.

Mettaton grumbled over having to leave his warm cocoon but followed Sans into the kitchen anyway.

"Why do you want to do this in here?" Mettaton leaned against one of the counters.

"Better lighting." Sans replied. He pulled his hands out of his pockets, "Now show me what to do."

Mettaton struggled for a moment before he popped off his chest-plate, revealing wires and wheels aplenty. "Let's start here. All you need to do is make sure nothing is out of place or too hot... You're a smart skeleton, I'm sure you can figure it out."

Sans took a look inside of Mettaton's chest. Everything seemed to be as it was supposed to. "Okay. Now what?" Sans stood back.

Mettaton looked inside himself and paused momentarily. He shut his chest a little too quickly and smiled to cover it up. "Now we need to check my core to make sure it's functioning correctly. It's the last thing you need to do."

Sans watched Mettaton open the clear casing over his core. His hands seemed drawn towards the now-glowing heart.

"Oh my, such an eager man you are." Mettaton cooed. He nonchalantly gripped the edge of the counter to brace himself.

Sans finally grabbed Mettaton's core. Apparently he did something wrong because the robot shrieked and jolted backwards. He let go immediately. "Sorry! Did- did that hurt?"

"So rough, darling! Please be more gentle with that." Mettaton's voice wavered as he tried to stand up straight.

"EVERYTHING ALRIGHT IN THERE?" Papyrus called.

"Things are just pleasant, Papy!" Mettaton replied.

Sans made tender contact with the brightly glowing core again. He felt electricity dance around his fingers and run up his arm. He noticed something else that was weird and unexpected- it was wet. "Is it supposed to be dripping?" Sans ran his thumb over it.

Mettaton bit his lip and nodded, his legs beginning to shake. "It appears to be working just fine. I'm going to put the case back on now." He smiled sweetly and waited for Sans to move his hands.

Sans eyed the robot in front of him for a moment. The core was oozing pink stuff all over his hand. "Are you _sure_ it's supposed to do that?"

"Oh yes." Mettaton licked his lip.

Sans felt himself blush. This was awfully sexual for just a checkup. "Did I have to touch this?"

"Did you feel an electric current?" Mettaton was wondering why Sans still had his bony hand on his core.

"Yeah. I can still feel it." Sans's grin morphed into a wicked smirk. He pressed his thumb into the center. Sans felt the heart spurt out more viscous liquid. He also heard a very sensual moan drift from the robot.

Mettaton slapped a hand over his mouth and glared at the skeleton.

Sans pulled his hand back, satisfied with his new discovery.

Mettaton slammed the clear case back over the core and wiped off his front with Sans's jacket.

"Hey!" Sans was going to wipe his hand on his jacket anyway, but it was _his_ hand.

"You're the one who made the mess, numskull. Plus, it comes out easy." Mettaton hissed.

"Can't argue with that." Sans shrugged.

 

The two of them went back into the living room and joined Papyrus on the couch. Mettaton seemed content to be back in his lump of blankets. Papyrus was taking notes on how to woo attractive people from the romance movies that they watched. And Sans took another nap. 

They remained on the couch until it was almost time for their date. They couldn't be more excited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can pry Sans's slippers from my cold, dead hands. Though I do like the idea of him wearing sneakers without ever tying them.  
> But looking at his sprite I can't see anything but slippers.
> 
> Do you guys want smut? It'll be separate from this story to keep it organized, but it'll still relate to this fic.


	11. A Date to Die For

Through means of a taxi, the trio made it to their restaurant on time. Papyrus, who had never been downtown before, was mesmerized by the modern-looking human buildings. Even Sans had to admit that humans knew how to build pretty structures.

It became painfully obvious which restaurant Mettaton was taking them to. The one that looked way too tall to be a freaking restaurant with the dazzling fountain out front. The fountain may have been frozen, but it was still nice to look at.

Papyrus eagerly jumped out of the taxi as soon as it stopped in front of the building. Sans exited the vehicle much lazier and went to collect his overexcited brother while Mettaton paid for the ride.

Mettaton caught up with Sans easily with a few strides of those long legs. "It's good to see him so happy, isn't it?" His lips turned up in an affectionate smile as he watched Papyrus enjoy himself.

"Yeah." Sans felt himself grin a little wider. He called out to Papyrus, "Hey, bro, why don't you let us catch up?"

Papyrus turned and jogged up to them. "I DID YOU A FAVOR AND CAUGHT UP TO YOU INSTEAD."

Sans turned to Mettaton, "Isn't he the coolest?"

Mettaton just chuckled and nodded.

 

The restaurant was just as extravagant, if not more, inside. Mettaton was immediately recognized by a few of the people there and the three were quickly ushered away to their table. 

Sans was admiring the place on their way upstairs when a thought hit him. He decided to wait until they sat down to mention it. If they ever sat down. How many more stairs did he have to climb? Sans was ready to take a nap by the time they actually made it to their table. He flopped into his chair and received a judgmental look from their waiter. Sans ignored the human and focused on the menu given to him. This was the biggest menu he'd seen in a while. Then again, he just went to fast food places- mostly the new Grillby's- and they didn't have such a variety. Sans remembered he needed to ask Mettaton a question. He put the menu down and met the robot's gaze.

"See anything you like?" Mettaton smirked.

"Pretty much everything on this thing looks appetizing." Sans leaned forward with his elbow on the table, "But I do like what I'm lookin' at."

Mettaton appeared to be very pleased by his statement.

"Anyway, Metta, there's something I need to ask you." Sans was mildly startled to feel Mettaton's foot nudge his own under the table.

"Yes?" Mettaton cocked his head to the side.

Sans poked at Mettaton's leg with his toe but remained focused. "Why're you taking us to a restaurant if you don't eat anything. This place doesn't look cheap. Why spend so much money to watch other people eat?"

"THAT'S SIMPLE." Papyrus lowered his menu. "HE KNOWS ALL YOU EAT IS DISGUSTING JUNK FOOD, SO HE WANTED YOU TO STUFF YOUR FACE WITH SOMETHING MORE HIGH-BROW."

"Why would I eat an eyebrow?" Sans found it hard not to laugh at Papyrus's confused expression.

"While that is true, I felt as though I owed you for putting up with me. Especially you, Sansy~. You pretty much saved my life." Mettaton replied earnestly.

"YES. AND ISN'T IT TRUE YOU CARRIED HIM TO ALPHYS'S? LIKE A PRINCE CARRYING HIS ROBOT PRINCESS?" Papyrus was getting quite a few dirty looks from the other people in the room just for how loud he was.

"That's right, bro. But it wasn't easy, he weighs a Metta _ton_." Sans felt Mettaton's heel dig into his foot, ending their little game of footsie. Worth it.

 

The three of them enjoyed themselves immensely just by being around each other. However, Sans was coming up with a terrible joke for everything left and right. They were all ecstatic to finally get their food when it arrived. Sans because he was hungry, and the other two because this meant Sans had something other than puns in his mouth. And as irritating as the jokes were, Mettaton found them endearing. He found _Sans_ endearing. And mysterious. He was obviously smarter than Mettaton originally gave him credit for. He didn't think Sans was an idiot by any means. He just thought he was more like Papyrus: unintentionally silly. And to Mettaton, Sans appeared more powerful than he was letting on. Why else would he be so laid back? He has nothing to be afraid of. Mettaton also suspected that Sans was in fact _not_ with Alphys last night. Because he texted her about it and she said no. He was going to ask Sans about that later. But for now...

Mettaton entertained himself, and the skeletons, by talking to them about himself. Sans came to realize Mettaton's narcissism surpasses Papyrus's. But it didn't really bother him because he knew Mettaton cared about other people. He even mentioned his cousin, Blooky, and Shyren once or twice in his "I am amazing" rambling.

Papyrus finished eating his- take a wild _guess_ \- spaghetti and joined in on the conversation. He basically joined Mettaton's "I am amazing" bandwagon and just spouted compliments. A little too loudly apparently, for a waiter came by their table and asked Mettaton he could shut his bonehead friend up.

Needless to say they were kicked from the restaurant. It's hard not to get kicked out when you assault an employee like that. Mettaton paid for their meals and the damage done to the wall after he "accidentally" kicked the waiter through it.

By the time they went outside, Mettaton was fuming, Papyrus was trying to calm him down and Sans was trying so hard not to laugh.

"HE WAS PROBABLY BEING LITERAL. I DO HAVE A BONE-HEAD. BECAUSE I AM A SKELETON. PLEASE CALM DOWN." Papyrus flitted around the robot.

Sans placed a hand on Papyrus's back, "Bro, you might want to let him chill on his own. You could be _driving him up the wall_ right now."

"REALLY, SANS?" Papyrus huffed.

"It's fine, darlings. I'm fine. Honestly." Mettaton put his hands up and nearly stumbled as they walked away from the restaurant. He looked a little woozy.

"You okay there, Metta?" Sans reached over and grasped Mettaton's hand. It was burning hot.

"YES, YOU APPEAR TO BE NOT OKAY. WHAT'S WRONG?" Papyrus was at Mettaton's side in an instant.

The snowflakes that dared to land on Mettaton's metal body evaporated instantly with a hiss. "It's true I'm not feeling well. But I should... be... fine..." Mettaton didn't get to finish his sentence before he shut down and fell forward.

Sans was glad Papyrus was there to catch him. He wasn't sure if he could move forward fast enough to do so.

Papyrus shared an uncertain glance with his brother. "TO ALPHYS'S?"

Sans took out his phone. "To Alphys's."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mettaton will never catch a break.


	12. You're Gonna Have A Bedtime

Sans called Alphys and informed her about the situation as they traveled to her place- that way she wasn't as startled when they arrived.

The lab doors slid open when Sans and Papyrus approached, allowing for a much quicker entry. Alphys was at the door, waiting, and she welcomed them in. She instructed Papyrus on where to rest the robot and began her work.

"So he just overheated and s-shut down, huh?" Alphys popped Mettaton's chest open and checked inside.

"Yup." Sans nodded, taking a seat on a nearby chair.

"HE IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT, CORRECT?" Papyrus remained beside the lab table where he had gently placed Mettaton.

"O-of course!" Alphys pressed on something with a screwdriver and a chip popped out. It was smoking. "That's what I thought..."

"Sup?" Sans eyed the chip curiously.

"This old thing regulates his temperature. Or it _did_." Alphys carefully plucked the smoking metal from Mettaton's chest and tossed it to the side. I had to replace it while I fixed the better one. I didn't expect it t-to burn out so quickly." Alphys rummaged through a drawer and pulled out another identical chip. She pushed it into the empty slot and fiddled around some more with her screwdriver.

"HE MIGHT'VE GOTTEN ANGRY AT SOMETHING. WOULD THAT HAVE DONE IT?" Papyrus glanced at the wall before looking back at the scientist.

"Probably." Alphys shrugged and shut Mettaton's chest plate. "I'm just glad it wasn't from l-leftover virus." Alphys melted into her computer chair with relief.

"Us too, Al." Sans hopped off the chair. "So, would it be okay if we took him back home?"

Alphys looked at the skeleton suspiciously. "Sure. _Actually_ keep him at home this time. I-if that's not too much trouble!"

 "Yeah. Can do, boss." Sans chuckled nervously and walked over to his brother.

"SHOULDN'T METTATON BE, I DON'T KNOW, AWAKE NOW?" Papyrus pressed his fingers together in front of himself.

"He's just recovering in sleep mode," Alphys smiled up at Papyrus, finding his concern adorable. "I r-recommend letting him rest before taking him anywhere."

"Gotcha." Sans slowly returned to the chair.

"You can stay with him i-if you like. I'll be in my room if you need me." Alphys smiled anxiously and skittered out of the room.

Sans barely registered falling asleep in that chair.

 

Sans woke up after a while. He cracked his eyes open and looked at the blurry light in front of him. He was not in Alphys's lab. He was, in fact, at home staring at the TV in the dark. He was also very, very warm. He reached over to adjust his jacket and that's when he noticed the pair of robotic arms that were wrapped around his middle. He was sitting in Mettaton's lap. This was good.

"I see you decided to join us, lazybones." Mettaton spoke sweetly into Sans's nonexistent ear.

"Five more minutes." Sans readjusted himself into a better sleeping position.

"NOW IS NO TIME TO BE SLEEPING. YOU MISSED MOVIE NIGHT LAST NIGHT AND YOU SLEPT THROUGH IT AGAIN!? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH YOU IF YOU'RE TOO LAZY TO WATCH A MOVIE?" Papyrus prodded Sans's side, jostling him out of his haze of sleep.

Sans exhaled and looked at Mettaton as best as he could from his position. "Did you, uh... How did I get here?"

Mettaton smirked, "When a mother skeleton and a father skeleton love each other-"

"You know what I mean, you ass." Sans chuckled.

"I carried you. It wasn't easy, you know. You weigh a skele _ton."_ Mettaton squeezed Sans in a hug.

Sans snickered, "Oh my god."

"YOU'RE BOTH GROUNDED." Papyrus threw a pillow at them.

"Oh?" Mettaton turned his attention to Papyrus. "Tell me, Papy, what's my punishment." He raised an eyebrow and bit his lip as he smirked.

Papyrus appeared to have something to say, but backed down when he acknowledged Mettaton's sexual undertones.

Sans rolled his eyes "Good to have you back, Metta." He patted one of Mettaton's arms.

"Hm." Mettaton kissed the back of Sans's head.

Sans drummed his fingers along the metal appendages, enjoying the sound. "But seriously, you are grounded. Doctor's orders."

"What?" Mettaton muttered indignantly.

"IT'S TRUE. ALPHYS SAYS YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO GO ANYWHERE UNTIL SHE THINKS YOU'RE ALL BETTER." Papyrus pointed out. "YOU NEED LOTS OF REST. AND WATER AND SUNLIGHT."

"Pretty sure that's for plants, bro." Sans smirked.

"ARE YOU CALLING METTATON A PLANT?" Papyrus readied his next pillow projectile.

"Wait, do plants even need rest? Pap, where'd you get this information?" Sans laughed.

"THE INTERNET!" Papyrus announced proudly. "THAT IS WHERE I LEARNED MOST OF MY ROBOT-CARE INFORMATION."

Sans and Mettaton looked at each other.

"What did you learn, darling?" Mettaton pressed.

"MANY THINGS! ONE OF THOSE AFOREMENTIONED THINGS IS THAT ROBOTS LIKE IT WHEN YOU SCRATCH BEHIND THEIR EARS." Papyrus pulled out a list.

Sans reached behind him and scratched aimlessly through Mettaton's hair. Mettaton swatted his hands away and fixed his hair.

"THEY ALSO NEED LOTS OF LOVE AND ATTENTION TO BE HAPPY AND HEALTHY." Papyrus continued down his list.

Sans rubbed Mettaton's leg and grinned up at him. "There ya go." Sans was a little surprised at how soft Mettaton's thigh was. Mettaton was pretty hard and sturdy on his upper body. Sans hadn't exactly gone out of his way to feel Mettaton up, so this was a nice surprise. He then realized that he was sitting on Mettaton's legs. He should've been able to feel it then.

"Don't stop." Mettaton hummed, running his fingers down Sans's arm and holding his immobile hand.

"SEE. I TOLD YOU HE'D LIKE IT." Papyrus smiled happily and looked at the rest of his list. "IT ALSO SAYS THEY LIKE BONES. THAT WOULD EXPLAIN HIS ATTRACTION TO US."

Sans didn't bother telling Papyrus he found an article about plants and dogs- not robots.

"HMM. I BELIEVE IT IS ABOUT TIME TO RETIRE TO BED. YOU LOOK A LITTLE LOW ON BATTERY, METTATON." Papyrus reached over and cupped Mettaton's cheek in his glove-clad hand.

Mettaton leaned into the touch. "I completely agree, Papy. Restarting after overheating took up a bit of battery."

Papyrus bumped his forehead against Mettaton's- the skeleton version of a kiss. As one cannot smooch without lips.

Mettaton did the actual kissing for him, turning Papyrus into a blushing heap of bones.

"Do you really have to move? I'm kind of comfortable here." Sans wiggled in his spot.

"My charging cable is upstairs. Plus, it won't reach the outlet from here if I had it with me." Mettaton patted Sans's head affectionately.

"Nah. Still don't feel like getting up." Sans relaxed, slipping down a tad.

Mettaton sighed and stood up, making Sans slump onto the floor.

"Aw." Sans muttered in defeat.

"You two really need to come stay at my place sometime soon. That way we can all fit in one bed." Mettaton reached down and lifted Sans into his arms like a child.

"WOWIE, YOU HAVE A BED BIG ENOUGH FOR THE THREE OF US?" Papyrus perked up.

"A large bed is good for posing dramatically after a nightmare. Or any dream, really. But I suppose it could be used by multiple people." Mettaton heard snoring coming from over his shoulder. He was not surprised that Sans was already asleep again. "I think it's past the little guy's bedtime." Mettaton smiled, astounded that someone could fall asleep that fast.

"IT'S ALWAYS BEDTIME FOR SANS. BUT I PERMIT YOU TO TAKE HIM TO BED WITH YOU. SLEEPING TOGETHER CAN STRENGTHEN A BOND. UNDYNE TOLD ME THAT." Papyrus smiled. "UM, THAT REMINDS ME. WHEN MAY I HAVE A TURN SLEEPING WITH YOU?"

"How about tomorrow evening we sneak over to my place? We can all use my bed. How does that sound, darling?" Mettaton tried his best to not let his low battery get the best of him. Sans was actually heavy.

"HMM, IT FEELS DISHONEST. BUT I SUPPOSE IF IT'S FOR ONE NIGHT. AND FOR THE SAKE OF OUR BOND. LET'S DO IT. TOMORROW OF COURSE. NYEH HEH." Papyrus began rearranging the couch so he could sleep on it. "OH! AND THANKS FOR STICKING UP FOR ME. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO KICK THE GUY, BUT I APPRECIATE IT."

"Of course, darling! No one gets to insult my dear Papyrus. Or Sans." Mettaton gave Sans an affectionate squeeze. Sans murmured sleepily. "Goodnight, Papyrus." Mettaton called as he made his way up the stairs.

"GOODNIGHT!" Papyrus giddily jumped under the sheets on the bed and was left to wonder all night what it was like to sleep with his idol.


	13. Fluff Stuff

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the hiatus! I've been having a bad time lately and I feel terrible that I let it effect my update schedule. So, I'm sorry for that. Now we'll return to your regularly scheduled fluff.

Meanwhile upstairs, Mettaton dropped Sans on Papyrus's bed and woke him up.

"Man, what was that for?" Sans wasn't hurt or anything, but the sensation of falling freaked him out.

"I've carried you around a little too much, darling. I'm just too tired to go on." Mettaton turned around and fell onto the bed next to him with a leg sticking straight up.

"Are you too tired to get up and turn the light off? Because I don't want to get up either." Sans kicked off his slippers onto the floor and got comfortable.

Mettaton made a noncommittal grunt as he turned his head to look at the light switch. He stretched an arm over and flicked the light off.

Sans grinned in the dark, "That sure does come in _handy_." His eyes hadn't adjusted yet, so he couldn't see Mettaton's hand approach his face. He was flicked on the forehead.

"Go to sleep," Mettaton muttered.

Sans chuckled, "Sure. But, uh, don't you need to plug yourself in?"

"Oh. Right. Could you get that for me?" Mettaton lazily rolled over onto his front and pointed at his back.

"You are really reminding me of a bicycle right now." Sans felt around for Mettaton's charging cord.

"What?" Mettaton laughed at the absurdity of the statement.

Sans found the cord and felt around on Mettaton's back for the port. As he did so he leaned close to the robot's head and whispered the punchline, "You're just... two tired." He snickered when he heard Mettaton groan into the mattress.

Mettaton lifted his face from the bed, "That was terrible. You're terrible."

"Actually, I'm Sans." Sans found the port and worked on plugging the cord in.

Mettaton's only response was an irritated sigh. He rest his head back on the bed, but he didn't keep it there for long. When Sans managed to finally plug him in, he lifted his head, arched his back and let out a sensual, _"Oh yes~"_

Sans suddenly felt dirty. "Did you- was that-"

"I'm just messing with you, Sansy," Mettaton giggled and patted Sans's skull.

Sans smiled. He was glad Mettaton liked him enough to joke with him. He scooted back and shimmied under the covers. "C'mere." He patted the area next to him.

"Do you always wear your clothes to bed? Because that's what you've done for the past few days." Mettaton casually crawled forward and slipped under the sheets.

"Nah, but I figured you'd be uncomfortable if I didn't wear them. Plus it's kinda cold." Sans shrugged.

"I thought skeletons didn't feel the cold." Mettaton put his hand on Sans's head and rubbed his cheek with his thumb.

Sans found the touches very soothing and was beginning to fall asleep again. "We sorta do... but it doesn't... bother us."

"Alright. I'll let you get back to sleeping, lazybones." Mettaton kissed Sans's forehead and snuggled close to him.

Sans felt Mettaton's arms wrap around him and squeeze. He never really expected the famous Mettaton to be a cuddler. But that was not a problem. Mettaton was like Sans's personal heater. Sans was so comfortable that he wasn't even bothered by Mettaton's core glowing obnoxiously as he charged. Well, he was being hugged so close to the robot that his body was covering most of the light anyway. Sans figured he'd get used to it if he kept sleeping in the same bed as Mettaton. However, that was _if_ Mettaton decided to stay in a relationship with him and his brother. He began to feel doubts creep up his spine. So many negative "what if"s floated through the dark in his mind. His train of thought derailed when he felt Mettaton shift next to him.

Mettaton half-sat up and dragged Sans under him. He flopped back down with his head resting on Sans's tummy. _"So soft, darling,"_ he murmured sleepily, rubbing his cheek on Sans's shirt.

Sans figured he could stop worrying for now.

\---

The next day, Mettaton took the skeletons over to his house. He told them not to worry about any lingering nano-virus, as that was taken care of the first day he was absent... apparently.

Papyrus was enthralled by the lavishness of the inside of Mettaton's place.

"Feel free to look around, sweetheart!" Mettaton dramatically gestured to the different hallways and the flight of stairs.

"REALLY? COOL!" Papyrus bounced off to explore the new territory.

Sans moved to follow him, but Mettaton's hand caught his hood.

"I'd like a word with you." If Mettaton's voice was any indication, Sans might be in danger of a bad time.

Sans turned around, grinning like usual. "Sup?"

Mettaton ushered Sans in the opposite direction Papyrus ran off to and began his interrogation. "That night you said you were with Alphys... Where were you really? Because Alphys told me you were, in fact, not with her."

Sans shrunk into his jacket. "I was... out."

"Out where?" Mettaton folded his arms across his chest and tapped his foot.

"Out _side_." Sans smiled nervously, hoping to lift the mood.

Mettaton glowered at him. "I'm not mad about you lying. Everyone's got their reasons, honey, and I understand. But I want to know where you went so I know if I should be worried or not."

Sans weighed his options for a moment, but he caved under the robot's intense gaze. "I tracked down the people who infected you and made sure they wouldn't do it again." Sans shrugged his shoulders and kept a nonchalant tone.

"You didn't kill them, did you?" Mettaton looked severely disappointed.

"What? No! I might have roughed 'em up and gave 'em a strict warning, but no one died." Sans assured him.

Mettaton smiled, "Oh good, because they were still fans of mine. I can't have someone killing my fans."

Sans scoffed, "Right." Friendly or not, Mettaton was still Mettaton: selfish.

"Now that that's out of the way," Mettaton gave Sans a look that made him shudder, "I have to thank you."

Sans stopped shrinking into his hoodie. "Wh- for what?"

Mettaton didn't answer him, instead he grabbed Sans's collar and pulled him into a kiss.

Startled, Sans didn't know how to react at first. But he soon melted into it and reached up to rake his fingers through Mettaton's hair, deepening the kiss.

Mettaton broke away, smirking. What a devil. "Thanks for looking out for me, Sans." He touched his forehead to Sans's.

"Yeah. No prob." Sans winked.

"AM I INTERRUPTING SOMETHING?" Papyrus appeared at the entryway, smirking with a hand on his hip.

Sans slipped his hands back in his pockets and tried to hide in his jacket. But if they really didn't want to get caught, perhaps they shouldn't have chosen a hallway to smooch in. He wasn't too embarrassed.

"No, we were just finishing up, dear." Mettaton righted himself and approached the other skeleton.

"OH, ALRIGHTY THEN!" Papyrus smiled.

"So, did you find anything that piques your interest?" Mettaton placed a hand on Papyrus's shoulder and led him out of that hallway. There wasn't much to see down there anyway. It was just the kitchen and dining room.

"I REALLY LIKED THE GUEST ROOM- THE ONE WITH PICTURES OF YOU ALL OVER IT?" Papyrus tapped his gloved fingers together.

"Oh? I'm glad you like it. I figured that if I ever do let a guest stay here, they'd enjoy looking at me before they go to sleep." Mettaton turned to see if Sans was following them.

He wasn't. Sans wasn't sure if he was "invited" to Mettaton-Papyrus time.

Mettaton stretched an arm behind himself and Papyrus and dragged Sans to walk next to them.

"MAY I STAY IN THAT ROOM?" Papyrus asked hopefully.

"If you would like that, of course you can. But wouldn't you prefer to be with the real thing?" Mettaton ran his hand down his waist and hips to accentuate his point.

"OH! NEVER MIND THEN. I FORGOT THAT WAS AN OPTION. NYEH HEH." Papyrus laughed nervously.

Sans couldn't help but chuckle at his brother. Papyrus was pretty cool, but he could also be adorable.

Mettaton draped his arms around the skeletons' shoulder as be as as he could given the height difference, "So, what would you two like to do now?"

Sans perked up, "I dunno, Metta, it might take a while for me to decide. Why don't you show me your bed so I can _sleep on it?_ "

"IF YOU MUST ASK TO TAKE A NAP YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO SO IN PUN FORM!" Papyrus glared at him from the other side of the robot.

Mettaton finished pinching the bridge of his nose in reaction to the pun and looked to Papyrus. "What about you, darling?"

"I WOULD ACTUALLY LIKE TO SEE THIS BED OF YOURS AS WELL. BUT NOT TO SLEEP! SLEEPING IS FOR WHEN THE SUN SETS! FRISK SAID SO." Papyrus informed them. "I WAS JUST WONDERING HOW BIG IT REALLY IS IF IT CAN FIT ALL OF US ON IT LIKE YOU SAY." He rubbed his chin in thought.

"To my room we go then." Mettaton chirped.

 

"WOWIE! THIS IS THE BIGGEST BED I HAVE EVER SEEN!" Papyrus stared at the biggest bed he had ever seen in awe.

"Only the best _for_ the best, of course!" Mettaton placed a hand on his chest proudly. "But that doesn't mean the second best can't use it too." He patted Papyrus on the back.

"WHAT ABOUT SANS?" Papyrus sounded genuinely worried.

"He can use it too, Papy." Mettaton assured him, rubbing his back soothingly.

"AH, GOOD. SANS, YOU'RE WELCOME." Papyrus put his hands on his hips triumphantly.

"Thanks bro, you're a life saver." Sans grinned.

"Feel free to visit the bed any time. Just make it when you're done sleeping or I'm revoking the invitation." Mettaton shot Sans a glare.

"Cool. So, uh, can I use it now?" Sans eyed the bed longingly.

"YES. I WISH TO SIT UPON IT WITH BOTH OF YOU AND BOND. AND MAYBE LET ME PLAY WITH YOUR HAIR?" Papyrus looked at his idol expectantly.

Mettaton chuckled- such a lovely sound- and smiled- what beautiful lips. "I can't say no to you, Papy." He could tell he just made Papyrus's day. Mettaton tore his eyes away from Papyrus's elated expression and noticed Sans was already asleep on his bed.

"SANS! WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT SLEEPING? WHEN THE SUN IS DOWN! IT'S NOT DOWN YET!" Papyrus launched himself over the edge of the bed and tackled his brother.

"Ah, c'mon bro! Give a skeleton a break." Sans playfully shoved Papyrus off of him.

"I THINK YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH BREAKS." Papyrus tapped Sans's skull.

"Better take me to a mechanic then." Sans winked. He then had a pillow thrown at his face. He held the pillow in front of him as a shield. "Hey. Why did the royal guardsman stay in bed all day?"

"SANS, NO." Papyrus readied his next pillow.

"He was _undercover_." Sans hid behind his shield.

"AARGH!" Papyrus didn't actually get to throw his projectile. Mettaton took it from him.

"What did the skeletons say when they ripped the robot's expensive pillows? Nothing. Because they _died_." Mettaton placed the pillow where it belonged.

"SORRY." Papyrus rubbed his arm, embarrassed.

Sans slowly put the pillow back and returned his hand to his pocket.

Mettaton found it impossible to stay angry at either of them. "It's fine, Papyrus." He climbed onto his bed and sat between the two, "I think it's about time to shower me with love and affection, wouldn't you agree?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the idea that Sans has a belly when he has something covering it, but when you lift his shirt there's nothing there. Magic.


	14. Calm Before the Storm

Papyrus was not too shabby at showering Mettaton with compliments and the like. Mettaton appreciated the gratuitous affection because if there's one thing he liked more than talking about himself, it was listening to others talk kindly of him.

Papyrus leaned his back against the headboard of the bed with Mettaton resting against his chest. Sans got comfortable laying between Mettaton's legs with his head on the robot's abdomen. Mettaton traced random designs on the back of Sans's skull with his fingers as he listened to Papyrus talk about how wonderful he was.

Mettaton nearly left his corporeal body when he felt bony fingers creep up his neck and trail through his hair. It took him a second to realize Papyrus took his mittens off, but when he did he relaxed again.

Papyrus quieted down as he focused on Mettaton's synthetic hair. He seemingly mesmerized himself with his meticulous hand movements. Or perhaps he was listening for a sign of approval.

Mettaton moved his hand over until he touched Papyrus's idle one. He lifted it into his lap, or what remained of it due to Sans taking up his lap in its entirety, and slipped the mitten off. He turned it around and examined it. It wasn't often that he got to see Papyrus's hands. Or Sans's for that matter.

"I SEE YOU HAVE TAKEN A LIKING TO MY HAND," Papyrus chirped, looking over Mettaton's shoulder. "HOWEVER, I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO HAVE IT, FOR IT BELONGS AT THE END OF MY ARM."

Mettaton chuckled, "Right." He felt the hand slip from his hair. It ended up resting on Mettaton's outer thigh.

"METTATON, THERE'S SOMETHING I'VE BEEN WANTING TO ASK YOU LATELY." Papyrus gripped the robot's hand.

"Go ahead, dear." Mettaton leaned to the side slightly so he could look at Papyrus's face.

"IT WILL COME AS A SHOCKING SURPRISE FOR YOU, BUT THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS NEVER BEEN IN A RELATIONSHIP BEFORE." Papyrus rubbed Mettaton's hand with his thumb anxiously.

Mettaton gasped, "No. You're too handsome." He held back a smile.

"I KNOW, I KNOW. IT'S HARD TO TAKE IN, BUT IT'S TRUE. THIS ALSO COMES WITH A FEW CONSEQUENCES THAT THE INTERNET COULD NOT AID ME WITH." Papyrus craned his neck to see if Sans was listening. He would be a little embarrassed if Sans knew he wasn't exactly as cool as he seemed to be. Sans appeared to be asleep.

"Like what, Papy?" Mettaton traced Papyrus's jawline with his free hand.

Papyrus glanced away for a second to recover from the sensual touch. "I DO NOT KNOW HOW I AM SUPPOSED TO DISPLAY MY LOVE FOR YOU," he admitted. "I KNOW AS A FAN I WILL APPEAR AT ALL OF YOUR CONCERTS AND WATCH EVERY NEW EPISODE YOU PRODUCE ON TV. THAT IS HOW TO LOVE AN IDOL. HOWEVER, IF I AM DATING YOU I FEEL AS THOUGH THERE IS A DIFFERENT WAY TO CONVEY MY AFFECTION TOWARDS YOU."

"It's fine if you want to call me your boyfriend, Papy. It is what I am, am I not?" Mettaton offered a smile. "There's not a definite answer to your query, dear. You show me that you love me in a lot of ways already. You're doing it right now." His voice dropped to a sultry tone, "Unless... you had something else in mind."

"I DID, ACTUALLY." Papyrus pointed out. "THOUGH I'M NOT CERTAIN WHAT IT WOULD BE. THE INTERNET TOLD ME PEOPLE WHO DATE DO SPECIAL THINGS INVOLVING LOVE."

Mettaton wasn't sure if he should be worried or excited. "Can you give me an example?"

"YES. ONE OF THE THINGS MENTIONED WAS A GIFT EXCHANGE THAT WAS MORE OR LESS ONE-SIDED. AND IT INVOLVED VERY EXPENSIVE GEMS ON METAL. AND CARS. AND SOMETIMES CHILDREN." Papyrus looked uncomfortable with that last part.

"I'll appreciate anything you give me, but I don't need gifts in order to prove your affection. Papyrus, just be yourself and do what you feel is right, okay?" Mettaton patted Papyrus's cheek and kissed his chin. He felt a hand on his knee and glanced down at Sans. Sans gave him a thumbs-up.

"A-ALRIGHT. I'LL DO THAT! I SHALL BEGIN DISPLAYING AFFECTION NOW." Papyrus pulled Mettaton into a hug and nuzzled his skull against the side of Mettaton's head. "IS THIS RIGHT?"

"Does it feel right?" Mettaton chuckled.

"YES." Papyrus "kissed" his cheek.

"Then it's right, darling." Mettaton assured him.

"GOOD! I AM GLAD I DO NOT HAVE TO PREFORM THE OTHER ACTS DEPICTED ON THE INTERNET." Papyrus loosened the hug and found Mettaton's hands with his. He laced their fingers together.

Mettaton wasn't even going to ask. "I'm not going to make you do something you're not comfortable with, Papy."

"WONDERFUL." Papyrus looked off to the side. "I'M NOT CERTAIN WHAT A 'BLOWJOB' IS, BUT IT SOUNDS UNPLEASANT."

Both Mettaton and Sans stiffened.

"You don't have to worry about that, darling." Mettaton grinned, trying not to laugh. He felt Sans chuckle silently to himself.

 

They practically spent the entire day up in Mettaton's room. Their time mostly consisted of Mettaton and Papyrus talking while Sans napped around the bed in random spots. The time went by so quickly they didn't notice it was well into the evening until Mettaton checked his phone.

"Man, are you telling me I missed four entire meals?" Sans's front hung off the side of the bed.

"Five? There are only three in a day." Mettaton slipped off his bed, thinking of what he was going to make his skeleboyfriends for dinner.

"I already had pre-breakfast and breakfast. But I missed brunch, lunch, linner, and dinner." Sans began falling off the bed, but he was too lazy to get back up so he fell. "Guess we're gonna to have to make up for that, huh?" He muttered from the floor.

Papyrus hopped off the bed and stood over his brother. "GET UP, SANS. I DOUBT METTATON WANTS YOU EATING IN HIS ROOM, SO TO THE KITCHEN WE GO."

"Wake me up when the food's done, okay, bro?" Sans waved at him.

Mettaton smiled and shook his head. "I'll be in the kitchen if you need me. I think I'll try my hand at some gourmet spaghetti."

"GOURMET, HUH? THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT! NYEH HEH HEH!" Papyrus shot Mettaton a determined grin as the robot left. "AS FOR YOU," he stared at his brother contemplatively.

 

Mettaton was surprised to see Papyrus shuffle into the kitchen while rolling Sans in front of him like some sort of snowball.

"Couldn't you have just... picked him up?" Mettaton raised an eyebrow at the absurdity.

"WE CAN'T BE CARRYING HIS LAZY SELF EVERYWHERE. THEN HE WOULDN'T LEARN A THING." Papyrus stepped over his brother, who remained on the floor, and peered at Mettaton's handiwork.

"So, Sans, how'd those stairs treat you?" Mettaton smirked.

Sans groaned from his spot on the floor.

Papyrus marched over to his brother and gently lifted him off the tile. "SANS! WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS? GO SIT AT THE DINING TABLE LIKE A PROPER SKELETON." He ushered Sans into the next room over and rushed back to Mettaton's side. He stared at the robot in confusion. "WHY ARE YOU STIRRING SO GENTLY?"

"I don't want boiling water all over the place. Undyne is far too aggressive with her food. There is passion, but no love- which is the secret to successful cooking." Mettaton winked.

"WHAT!? ARE YOU TELLING ME UNDYNE WAS WRONG TO BE PASSIONATE?" Papyrus sounded more offended than surprised. Mettaton might be his boyfriend, but Undyne was is best friend. No one gets to insult his best friend.

"Well, no. Passion is a good thing." Mettaton tread carefully. "I just... cook a different way." _The right way._

"I SEE... WHY DON'T YOU SHOW ME HOW YOU DO IT?" Papyrus put his hands on his hips and looked to Mettaton expectantly.

Mettaton brightened up, "Certainly!"

 

Sans could hear Mettaton's "cooking show" voice from the dining room. For a second he wondered if someone had left a TV on. And as amused as he was by Mettaton showing Papyrus how to not destroy a kitchen, Sans grew bored of just sitting there and staring at a wall. He got off his chair and walked over to a window. It looked into Mettaton's back yard. Or it should have. Upon taking a closer look, Sans realized snow was covering the window past where he could see. Only the top of the window was not covered with snow. It was either really windy, or snow was coming down in sheets. Snow was never really that big of a deal back in Snowdin. Maybe it wasn't so bad on the surface. He could only wait to find out.

Eventually, Sans was tired of standing and sat back down. Just in time for a steaming hot plate of spaghetti to be set in front of him. He would prefer some fries, but he figured it was better to eat what was given to him. Besides, Mettaton made it. He couldn't remember if the robot was any good at cooking. He wasn't really interested in Mettaton's shows.

Papyrus sat across from his brother with his own plate and took a bite. Moments of concentrated chewing passed before he spoke. "I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU DID IT, WELL ACTUALLY I DO BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME, BUT THIS IS NEARLY AS GOOD AS MINE, METTATON!"

"Anything produced by me is perfect, darling. Don't expect less." Mettaton chose not to sit in a chair, but to pose on top of the table.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK, SANS?" Papyrus pointed his fork at the skeleton in question.

"I think the empty plate is evidence in and of itself." Sans looked at the plate then back up at Papyrus.

"I'm not even going to ask how you ate that so quickly." Mettaton switched poses.

"IT'S BEST NOT TO." Papyrus sighed, stabbing his fork into a meatball.

\---

Mettaton had no idea why he thought sharing a bed with brothers would be a good idea. He wondered if he should even be in the middle any more.

"SANS! STOP HOGGING THE BLANKETS!" Papyrus tugged the sheets over to his side.

"Can't help it, bro. There's so much of me to cover." Sans grabbed the sheets and rolled over with them.

"I AM TALLER THAN YOU." Papyrus reached over Mettaton and shoved Sans nearly clean off the bed.

"I'm wider." Sans shimmied back to his spot.

Both skeletons had robotic arms warp around their torsos and were pulled in close to Mettaton, who momentarily rolled onto his back. "Guys. You're going to lose your 'Sleeping With Mettaton' privileges if you keep this up."

"Sorry babe." Sans chuckled but cut the laugh short when he received a harsh squeeze.

"YES, MY APOLOGIES." Papyrus pleaded.

"You are forgiven. Now go to sleep." Mettaton released them and rolled onto his side, facing Sans.

Sans didn't hesitate to grab Mettaton's arm and loop it back around himself. He fell asleep shortly thereafter.

Papyrus gradually inched closer to Mettaton's back and rested at a suitable distance. Apparently he wasn't close enough for Mettaton's liking and he was yanked into a spooning position. Papyrus rather fancied being the big spoon and found himself quickly falling asleep. Mettaton was a pretty neato guy and Papyrus would be devastated if something were to happen to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something wicked this way comes.


	15. Gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a short story. WHAT HAPPENED?

The sound of glass breaking rang out through the quiet house, startling both Sans and Papyrus awake.

Sans remained still, trying hard to listen for another sound.

Papyrus sat up and took in his surroundings. Mettaton's window wasn't broken. The vanity mirror in the corner was fine. Mettaton himself was still asleep. Papyrus assumed he was a heavy sleeper because that crash was _loud_.

Footsteps. Sans could hear footsteps downstairs. Nervousness spread through his body like electricity. He figured revealing his powers to Papyrus was worth saving a few lives if that was necessary. He hoped it wasn't. And it really shouldn't be. Mettaton has proven himself very capable of defending- as long as he doesn't have a heart-to-heart with the intruder that is. Sans sat up a little and looked at his brother in the darkness. He looked worried.

The Great Papyrus wasn't afraid though. He was a brave skeleton. A brave skeleton who needed to protect his brother and boyfriend. Papyrus waited a moment before speaking as quietly as he could, "SANS... SOMEONE IS HERE." He slowly exited the bed. "I AM GOING TO INVESTIGATE. DO NOT FOLLOW ME."

"Pap, that is not a good idea." Sans fully sat up. He looked over at the resting robot and shook him. "Hey, Metta, you got a visitor." No response.

A few noises could be heard downstairs, prompting Papyrus to leave the room.

Sans frowned and shook Mettaton a little harder. "C'mon. You guys call _me_ lazy, but when there's an emergency _you_ sleep through it." Nothing. Something was wrong. Sans tossed the sheets off of the both of them and peered over Mettaton's back. He was plugged into the wall like he was supposed to be. He didn't do anything yesterday to completely drain it, so he should have at least a little battery power by now. However, Sans noticed that Mettaton's core was not glowing. It normally shimmered like a dull star when he was charging. Sans reached over to a bedside lamp and clicked it on. It remained off. The power was out. Great. But even so, Mettaton should have _some_ charge! Something was oh, so very wrong.

The entire time Sans was examining Mettaton he was listening intently for a sign of his brother being in trouble. So far, he heard nothing. Even the sounds coming from downstairs stopped. This silence was terrifying.

There was a thump downstairs. A single, loud thump. 

Sans opted to leave Mettaton upstairs, he should be fine, right? He crept down the stairway and listened.

Wind howled through the broken window in the entryway. Sans looked at the door next to the window; it was still locked.

Sans made his way through the dark house to the room he suspected the thump came from. The door was open but no one was inside. But there was clear evidence of a scuffle. Posters were torn off the wall where someone was pressed against it and fallen onto the floor. Sans felt his worries creep up his spine. He went ahead and checked every room down that hallway. No intruder, no Papyrus. He walked past the front door again on his way to the kitchen and dining room and froze. The door was unlocked and wasn't shut all the way. A sliver of light shone through the crack in the door. Sans put his hand to the doorknob and pushed it open.

It was easier to see outside because it was no longer snowing and just a smidge of moonlight could be seen through the clouds. Sans looked down at the snow by the door. There were footprints and two parallel lines leading away from the house. He looked closely at all of the footprints. There were three sets over by the window and three sets going towards the street. Everyone appeared to be gone. He followed the trail to the road, where a car had been parked moments ago but had hence driven off. 

Sans headed back inside and locked the door.

He anxiously checked every room on the bottom floor and made his way upstairs. All of the walking was seriously tiring him out.

Sans poked his head into Mettaton's room. He actually sighed in relief when he was Mettaton was still there. Sans checked the rest of the upstairs area and returned to Mettaton's room. He sat on the side of the bed and contemplating texting Papyrus, but what if it would give away his position if he was hiding? No. Papyrus wasn't one to hide. He pulled out his phone and asked his brother if everything was okay. The skeleton put his phone to the side while he waited for a response. He leaned back, propping himself up with his elbows, and stared at the wall.

Sans practically shrieked when he felt something brush against his elbow. He whipped around. It was just Mettaton. He still appeared to be asleep though. But it was evident that it was his metal hand that touched Sans. The skeleton lifted Mettaton's hand in his. It gripped back weakly. "Are you okay?" Sans found himself asking. There was no response. Sans pulled Mettaton into a sitting position and unplugged his charger. He was startled when Mettaton snapped his eye open and sat bolt upright himself. Sans was embraced by the robot in a tight hug.

"Oh, thank you, darling!" Mettaton sounded frantic. "Where is Papyrus?"

"I dunno, man." Sans guiltily looked off to the side. His phone vibrated to life as if on cue. Sans eagerly grabbed it. There was a message from Papyrus but it was obvious the person who typed the message was not Papyrus: **Come on over for your last performance, MTT. The other skeleton knows where we are.** Sans was hesitant to show Mettaton his phone, but it dawned on him that his brother was at the mercy of a notorious group of anti-monster advocates. 

"Well?" Mettaton peered over Sans's shoulder.

Sans held still while he let Mettaton read. He looked down at his feet. He felt so defeated.

"Sans..." Mettaton looped an arm around his shoulders. "Let's inform the others. I think a little revenge is in order."

Sans chuckled, "Right."  It was very hard to keep his cool when he was so scared. Not for himself, but for Papyrus. "Aren't you worried about endangering the others?"

"If these are the people you somehow dealt with singlehandedly, I'm certain the others can do just fine." Mettaton gave him a squeeze.

Sans could tell Mettaton was just as nervous as he was. He figured he's lighten the mood. "I kinda do want to see Undyne deck one of these guys in the jaw."

"Heh. That's the spirit. Now," Mettaton stood from the bed and faced the skeleton, "let's go get our Papyrus back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Papyrus.


	16. Rescue Team Go!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry. Not only did I make you all wait for this chapter, but it wasn't even satisfying. I was too focused on finishing it and not giving you what you waited for. So... Here's the fixed chapter!

Sans spread the word at Mettaton's request and they all met up at Alphys's lab.

Undyne was the first to show up despite her apartment being the farthest away. She yanked Sans and Mettaton in as soon as they arrived. "What took you so long!? Don't you know what kind of danger Papyrus is in!?"

"I'm sure th-they're well aware of that, Undyne!" Alphys patted Undyne's side soothingly. She understood Undyne's rashness. Hell, her best friend had been taken hostage.

"It's hard to get Sans to run anywhere, you know." Mettaton tapped his foot impatiently.

"That's why we took a shortcut. I'm sorry we were a few seconds later than you." Sans chided.

"Um, a-anyway," Alphys directed attention to herself, "I've managed to h-hack into their security system." She moved over to her computer. "From the security cameras, I can tell there's not many of them and a lot of their stuff is broken." She turned to her friends and offered a smile, "So, it should be easy for you three to go in."

"There's always a catch, what's the catch?" Undyne pressed, staring over Alphys's shoulder intensely.

"Well- I- um... I don't know if there is one," Alphys shrugged.

"Where's Papyrus?" Mettaton leaned over her other shoulder

Alphys tabbed through the security views and showed them an image of Papyrus. "He's been left alone in s-some sort of animal cage. He appears to be a little cramped, but unharmed."

"Let's stop wasting time and get him out of there!" Undyne clenched her fist.

"I agree." Mettaton looked to Sans. "Would you like to lead the way?"

Sans nodded, "I know a shortcut."

"I-I'll try my best to help out from here!" Alphys called to them as they left her lab.

\---

"This the place?" Undyne put a hand on her hip, mildly unimpressed. It was a warehouse in the middle of nowhere.

"Yup." Sans nodded.

The three of them were startled when Sans's phone rang. It was Alphys.

"H-hey, I forgot to tell you that Papyrus is somewhere in the hallway farthest right. Be c-careful. There's six of the humans in total they all seemed to be armed with some sort of weapon. All of th-them are long-range. Good luck." Alphys hung up.

Undyne cracked her knuckles and summoned a spear, "Six targets? I'm gonna stab them until their determination drips out! NGAHHH!"

"I think Mettaton's gonna beat you to it." Sans pointed over to the double doors, which Mettaton had kicked down.

" HOLD ON, PAPY, I'M COMING, BABY!!" Mettaton cried and rushed in.

"I think we found ourselves a distraction." Sans chuckled.

"Good! You can stay here if you want. I'm going in!" Undyne brandished her spear and followed in Mettaton's footsteps.

Sans cautiously tailed Undyne and looked around. Everything was exactly how it was the last time he was there- machinery everywhere. He didn't find it too strange that all of the devices in the warehouse were just regular old appliances- modified to do... something. Sans's wasn't sure what. He was also a little suspicious of the random areas covered with dust.

Sans could hear voices in the distance: The humans shouting incoherently, Undyne screaming fiercely as she threw spears and destroyed equipment. He then heard rushing footsteps behind him. He lethargically turned his head to see the unlucky fellow.

It turned out to be two fellows who were both armed, just like Alphys said. Sans sighed. Tonight just wasn't his night.

Sans could probably dodge easier if the humans weren't using ranged weapons. It is hard to dodge _bullets_ when you are used to being laid back and unathletic. But he had to be careful. He only had one HP. And he wasn't given a chance to retaliate this time. No, he let the humans live and "learn a lesson". Apparently the message they got from his mercy was "bring more artillery" and not "cherish your life." Sans could feel his bones ache as he began sweating. He would have to resort to running away. But to where? _Shouldn't these guys' guns have run out of ammo by now?_ They were taking turns firing and reloading. Nice teamwork.

Sans didn't have to worry about that for much longer because he grew so tired he couldn't stand. "Alright fellas, ya got me," he wheezed.

 

Meanwhile, Undyne was currently having a fantastic time thrusting her spears into an oven. It wasn't any specialized or altered oven. It was just... an oven. She didn't realize she was in a makeshift kitchen and had already obliterated the microwave and dishwasher. She just wanted to destroy something important to get the humans enraged at her first. She figured they'd put up a better fight that way. She was distracted from her appliance-destroying escapades when three of the humans rushed by the doorway, one of them bellowing directions. Undyne's grin of stab-happy mirth changed to a grimace.

"Hey!" She shouted, a little offended that they didn't even notice her.

She heard a voice come from the hallway, "I'll take care of this one, you guys go ahead."

As soon as the human stepped foot into the kitchen, Undyne pressed the tip of a spear against their throat. She flashed him a menacing smile, "You'll 'take care of this one,' huh?"

The human appeared momentarily terrified to have a spear-wielding fish lady towering above him. Then he remembered he had a gun and fired it into Undyne's stomach. Her blood painted the broken kitchenware behind them.

Undyne dropped her spear and took a step back. But she refused to fall. She still had some HP left in her. And a whole lot of DETERMINATION.

"I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED BY THE LIKES OF YOU!" She sprung forward, a spear in each hand. She managed to knock the gun out of his hands and injure his legs- preventing escape. She pointed a spear at his weird human nose.

"What do you want with Papyrus?" She growled, towering threateningly over the human.

The human winced at the pain in his legs but focused on the monster above him. "Who?"

"The sweet, kind skeleton you have locked away! What do you want with him?" Undyne sneered and jabbed her spear forward.

The human reflexively backed his head up and gasped.

"We couldn't get our hands on Mettaton, so we settled for someone he'd been spending time with." He figured if he told the truth, the monster might spare him.

"Okay... what do you want with Mettaton?" Undyne pressed, ignoring the singeing pain in her abdomen.

The human remained silent for a moment, prompting Undyne to poke at his face with her spear. He appeared to no longer be afraid, instead, he was irritated.

"We- we were going to broadcast him telling you freaks to go back to where you came from. And for the coup de grâce... we were going to kill him on camera. As an example to the rest of you." He gave Undyne an ugly smirk.

Undyne didn't really care much for Mettaton. But she didn't hate him. And she certainly didn't want someone to murder him. She briefly wondered if this human was worth gaining EXP.

"You have crossed so many lines. You and your friends. But the final line was messing with Papyrus," she said sternly as she glowered at the human. She took a step back, thought about her friends and everything they've fought for, and looked at the human in their way. 

Even with his human's-godly-amount of determination, he didn't survive her volley of spears.

 

Mettaton managed to find Papyrus quite easily. Alphys certainly was a blessing. And it was pretty lucky that Papyrus wasn't being guarded. However, he knew he had garnered some attention from the humans with his entrance, so he figured he should grab his skeleton and get out. He ran up to the ridiculously small dog cage Papyrus was in and began working on the locks. 

"Papyrus, darling, are you alright? Are you hurt? Which one hurt you? I'll kill them first." Mettaton quickly broke the locks and ripped the door off its hinges. 

"OH BOY, AM I GLAD TO SEE YOU METTATON!" Papyrus beamed as he was yanked out of the cage into Mettaton's arms. "I WAS WONDERING WHEN YOU WERE GOING TO WAKE UP. I THOUGHT YOU HAD BEEN HANGING AROUND SANS TOO MUCH AND LEARNED HOW TO SLEEP THROUGH ANYTHING." He would have hugged the robot back, but his arms were pinned to his sides in the tight hug. "THE GREAT PAPYRUS APPRECIATES THE CONCERN, BUT I AM NOT HARMED."

Mettaton took in a shaky breath and slowly released Papyrus from his grasp. "Thank god." 

The monsters' attention was directed to the figures that appeared at the doorway. Three humans stepped into the room. One stood prominently in front of the other two. His weapon seemed to be the most high-tech and dangerous.  


"We were hoping you would show up, Mettaton. I just didn't expect you to be so early... or that you would bring friends." The human had a sickly sweet smile on his face as he eyed the targets in front of him.

"This is one exception to my 'fashionably late' policy," Mettaton casually stepped in front of Papyrus protectively. He knew Papyrus was a strong fighter, but he also knew Papyrus was too kind to fight seriously.

"How wonderful. I was afraid we would have to wait for hours. Then we would've gotten bored. Who knows what we would have done then." The human shrugged, slightly looking behind him at his comrades. His friends chuckled at the implications. If they weren't so busy preparing for Mettaton's arrival, they probably would have broken a few of Papyrus's bones.

"But, please, Mettaton, we would like you to give us one last performance before you turn to dust." The human who appeared to be in charge lowered his gun and offered a hand to the robot across the room.

Mettaton hummed in serious thought, "It would be a shame if my fans only had reruns to watch without one final episode."

Papyrus tapped on Mettaton's shoulder. "METTATON, I AM CERTAIN THIS IS A TRAP. THEY EVEN SAID YOU WOULD TURN TO DUST AFTERWARDS. THE SITUATION HAS 'THIS IS A BLATANT TRAP' WRITTEN ALL OVER IT."

One of the humans raised their weapon in aggravation, ready to shoot this bonehead. 

The man in charge pushed his gun back down. "Don't be so hasty, my friend. You'll kill another monster in good time."

"Another?" Mettaton felt his circuits grow cold.

"We figured that if we can't force you guys to go back where you came from, we'd have to get rid of you one by one," the irritated human spat.

"METTATON, I HAVE COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT THESE ARE NON-FRIENDLY HUMANS." Papyrus stepped out from behind his boyfriend and stood next to him. "AND WE MUST BATTLE THEM TO PREVENT THEM FROM FURTHER HARMING OUR KIND."

Mettaton put a hand on the skeleton's arm. "Papyrus, I don't-"

"DON'T WORRY, I HAVE MORE DEFENSE THAN YOU. IF YOU GET HURT, I SHALL PROTECT YOU." Papyrus sent a bone flying at the humans, scattering them.

"Can we kill 'em now?" The antsy human asked their boss.

"Just the skeleton, we need Mettaton alive." The man in question hissed. He stood to the side while his cronies readied themselves to fight.

Right as the humans' fingers touched their triggers, the power to the building shut off. 

Papyrus remembered where the humans were standing an chunked a few bones in their general direction. The humans fell to the floor with satisfying thuds. The more irritable one shot blindly into the darkness, hitting both monsters with stray bullets... as well as the human next to him.

Papyrus and Mettaton only knew that because the human shouted, "You idiot, you shot _me!"_

"I'll go turn the power back on. You assholes make sure they don't escape!" The man in charge was heard running out of the room and down the hallway.

"Yeah okay. We'll do that. Can't see a fucking thing." A human muttered under their breath.

"I CANNOT SEE ANYTHING EITHER. IT SEEMS WE HAVE REACHED AN IMPASSE." Papyrus announced. His speaking notified the humans of his location and was immediately fired upon after finishing his sentence.

Mettaton didn't see what happened, but he felt Papyrus slump against him and figured he'd been shot again. He had to get both of them out _now_. He gently set the wounded Papyrus on the floor.

"It looks like you two want to see a special performance by yours truly!" Mettaton spoke quickly as he accessed the human eradication functions Alphys originally gave him.

Becoming Mettaton NEO was very risky. The light from his "wings" would obviously give away his and Papyrus's position, and his defense was basically nonexistent. But if he could get a good shot in, perhaps he could defeat these guys.

In a flash of blinding white light, Mettaton's EX form changed into his more battle-savvy NEO form. He knew he was no match for these humans, but that didn't mean he couldn't try to protect what he held dear.

Papyrus had to shield his eyes from the sudden light assaulting the room. When he deemed it safe to look again, he was a little astounded by what he saw. That wasn't Mettaton, was it? From what Papyrus knew, Mettaton was a sexy rectangle or a sexy humanoid robot. Now he was a _pointy_ sexy humanoid robot. He was reassured that the being before him was Mettaton when he spoke.

"I think it's _my_ turn to shoot a gun, hm?" Mettaton struck a pose and aimed his arm-cannon at the nearest human. And fired. The building shook with the force of the blast hitting the floor, where the human was laying.

The remaining human looked upon what was left of his comrade. When he returned his attention to Mettaton, he realized the robot was looming over him with a smug expression.

"MORE ACTION!" Mettaton posed.

"MORE ROMANCE!" Mettaton changed position and pointed his weapon at the human.

"MORE **BLOODSHED!** " Mettaton struck one last pose and fired the cannon again.

 

Sans was just coming to terms with the fact that he let everyone down and was about to be killed when the lights shut off. He used the moment of confusion to escape to another part of the warehouse. When the humans attempted to follow the sound of his footsteps, he threw them against the wall as hard as his magic would allow. He was so tired by that point he nearly fell asleep on the floor once he reached a safe area. He could just teleport out of there, but at the moment, he barely had any energy left. Plus, he could never leave his friends. He just needed a little time to recover.

His recovering time was cut short, however, when he felt the entire building shake. It was brief, but powerful. Like someone rammed a train into the side of the place for a second. Sans figured this meant big trouble for someone, he just wasn't sure who. Sans decided to investigate just in case his friends needed him.

On his way down the pitch black hallways there was another rumble. This time he heard a sound that was very familiar to him. It was akin to the sound his own weapons made- his gaster blasters. He walked a bit faster, using the dim blue light from his eye to light the way.

 

After finishing off the human, Undyne went on her way to find more humans to fight. As much as she cared about Papyrus, she figured Mettaton would get in her way if she tried to go rescue him. So, she settled with attempting to hunt the humans like she did in the past. She didn't get very far due to the power-outage. She figured it was either the weather or Alphys lending a helping hand to someone else. And if Alphys felt as though someone needed her... they needed Undyne more! She rushed off into the darkness to find her friend(s) in need! However, she stopped when a sharp pang surged through her. She put a hand to her bleeding gunshot wound. It wouldn't kill her. She knew that. But she might be killed if she was attacked again. She shook her head. She wasn't going to be attacked again. She was going to be the attacker! 

The building rumbled and a distant "bang" echoed down the empty corridors. It filled Undyne with determination to aid her friends.

 

Sans was nearly blinded when the LED warehouse lights came on. He let his eyes adjust and listened to his surroundings. All he could hear was the thrum of the strong lights above. He realized he was back in the main storage area. He remembered that this was the area he found all six of the humans a few nights before. They were using the large area for their inventions. Or they were until Sans broke everything. Sans walked over to one of the humans' decimated contraptions. It was pretty ragtag and nowhere near as functional as Alphys's inventions. He didn't notice the dust on it until now. He felt a chill run down his spine and he decided to continue searching for his friends. However, something caught his eye. At the far end of the storage room there was a collection of stage lights and cameras. He absolutely did not want to know what the humans used _cameras_ for in a warehouse in the middle of nowhere. Sans walked out of the storage area as quickly as his lazy legs would carry him.

He found himself back near the entrance within a matter of minutes. And he wasn't alone. The two humans he had previously slammed into the wall were still there and they were picking a fight with Undyne. Sans wasn't too surprised to see her injured, but he was concerned about her because he knew Undyne never gives up a fight- even if she needed to recover. However, she seemed to be enjoying herself immensely. A series of spears were shooting up from the ground and disappearing, causing the humans to run and jump around. Sans inwardly admitted that it was pretty hilarious. Sans sidled up beside her. She smiled upon seeing him safe.

"I guess you're not planning on sparing them. But you are planning _spearing_ them." Sans offered a grin.

"If they would hold _still_." Undyne would have thrown a few extra spears but she knew it would exacerbate her wound and she refrained.

Sans slowly removed his hand from his pocket and a blue flicker appeared in his eye. "I gotcha covered."

The humans froze, covered in a blue energy. They were held still as Undyne's spears harpooned them.

"That's for every monster you've killed!" Undyne barked. She clenched her fists in an attempt to release some of her anger.

Sans turned around and eyed the hallway he knew Papyrus was in. He was beginning to wonder here his brother and Mettaton were.

"That leaves three." Undyne exhaled and faced the same direction as Sans.

"Right." Sans nodded. 

 

"Papyrus?" Mettaton knelt down next to his boyfriend. "Papyrus, are you alright?"

"BEING A SKELETON MEANS I HAVE LESS SURFACE AREA TO HIT; HOWEVER, I HAVE BEEN HIT." Papyrus winced when Mettaton lifted him into his arms once again.

"Oh my god, baby, I am so sorry." Mettaton knew hugging him was a bad idea. Papyrus had cracks and chips in his bones. It had to be so painful. Poor thing. Mettaton himself had been shot, but it was nothing vital. (His legs were unscathed.)

"NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE. UNLESS IT WOULD MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER." Papyrus gave Mettaton a genuine smile.

Mettaton felt his heart melt- figuratively.

"I LIKE WHAT YOU'VE DONE WITH YOUR HAIR." Papyrus remembered it was always nice to mention a person's haircut.

"Huh?" Mettaton looked up. "Oh my god!" He stretched a hand up and tried to push his spiked up hair back down. It just sprung back up. Mettaton huffed. He would deal with that later. Right now, he needed to take Papyrus somewhere safe. He exited the room and walked back the way he came in. A voice behind them grated on Mettaton's hearing receptors.

"What did I tell those assholes?" The only remaining human, the head of the group, was at the other end of the hallway behind the two. Thoroughly pissed off, he didn't hesitate to aim his specialized weapon and fire.

It was not a volley of bullets like Mettaton was expecting. No, it was a singular blast of... something. Pure energy? Electricity? Light? That human may have copied the weapon's design from some sort of monster technology. That, or humans were much more advanced that Mettaton was giving them credit for.

There was no time to think about that. Mettaton barely avoided the blast. He couldn't fire back because he was holding Papyrus. All he could do was run. He was also very low on battery power and couldn't hold the NEO form any longer. Mettaton shook as his body changed back into his EX form. That distracted Mettaton long enough for the human to get a shot on him. It hit him square in the back and the force of it knocked him forward, sending both the robot and the skeleton to the ground... at the feet of Sans and Undyne.

It took Undyne seconds to process the situation and immediately hurl a volley of spears in the human's direction. He tried to shoot them before they reached him, but he was hit and ultimately killed.

Once the immediate threat was pacified, Sans checked on his brother and Mettaton. "Bro, you okay? Mettaton?"

"THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS ALIVE. I AM NOT NECESSARILY 'OKAY' THOUGH." Papyrus tried to sit up, but his arms just weren't cooperating with him. Sans helped him sit up and noticed that one of Papyrus's tibiae was broken.

"Glad you're alive then. Good to see ya, wouldn't want tibia, though. Heh." Sans chuckled.

 _"REALLY?"_ Papyrus groaned. "I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S MORE PAINFUL, MY BONES OR YOUR JOKES."

Undyne came over to them and surveyed her friends' conditions. "Papyrus, are there any more humans left? I feel like I need to avenge you."

"I'M NOT DEAD, THOUGH I AM A SKELETON, DON'T YOU NEED TO BE DEAD TO BE AVENGED?" Papyrus pondered.

"Nope. Now answer the question, dude." Undyne took a more gentle tone.

"METTATON 'TOOK CARE' OF TWO OF THEM IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT." Papyrus attempted to move again, but it hurt too much and he leaned against his brother for support.

"There's that guy and the other three guys I shishkabobed... We got all of them! Good work team!" Undyne grinned and turned her gaze to Mettaton. "Um, shouldn't he be- I don't know- up by now?" She nudged the robot's arm with her toe.

"I BELIEVE SO, YES." Papyrus tried, yet again, to shift his position. Sans patted his skull and told him to relax.

She rolled Mettaton over onto his back with her foot. She looked at his darkened eye. "He's out of battery."

"Just in time to give us a heart-attack." Sans grinned in relief.

"I'll carry Papyrus if you carry the robot." Undyne offered her strong arms for Papyrus carrying.

"But Mettaton's heavier." Sans accidentally complained.

"That is so like you, Sans. You lazyass. Fine, I'll carry both of them." Undyne scooped Mettaton up and draped him over one of her shoulders.

"You sure? You're wounded." Sans carefully lifted Papyrus off the ground.

"If you wanted to carry your brother, you could've just asked." Undyne smirked.

Sans shot her a guilty smile.

"Now let's get the hell out of here!" Undyne shouted enthusiastically.

\---

Sans took them all back to Alphys's via shortcut.

"Thanks dude." Undyne gave Sans a noogie with her free hand. She looked up at the lab doors. "I think I'm gonna crash here tonight. Wanna check in with Alphys before you guys go home and rest?"

"THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAN PROBABLY WALK THIS OFF." Papyrus announced proudly.

"The Great Papyrus is going to lie in bed and sleep this off." Sans corrected him. "And yeah, we need to thank the doc for all the work she's done."

Before they had a chance to activate the sliding doors, Alphys appeared and quickly urged them to come inside.

"It's cold out th-there and you're all hurt! Oh my god, I'm s-so sorry I couldn't have been more h-help!" Alphys nervously wrung her hands close to her stomach. Her eyes darted from injury to injury on each of her friends.

"WORRY NOT, DR. ALPHYS! WE SHALL ALL HEAL IN GOOD TIME. IT'S WHAT US MONSTERS DO." Papyrus assured her.

"He's right, Al." Undyne clapped her on the back. "Except for him," Undyne bounced Mettaton on her shoulder once for emphasis, "He's been shot a few times and needs repairs."

"BUT DO NOT FEAR, HE IS MERELY OUT OF BATTERY." Papyrus added.

Alphys smiled, "Th-thank you."

 

Alphys patched everyone up to her best ability. Sans helped a little. Alphys then led Undyne into her lab and had her carry Mettaton to a repair table, leaving Sans and Papyrus alone.

Sans took Papyrus over to Alphys's couch in the "house" part of her lab/house. Papyrus was propped against Sans's side in an upright sitting position as per his request.

Sans was so immensely relieved that Papyrus was alive and safe with him. Sans pat Papyrus's arm to get his attention. "Hey bro, if it's not too much to ask-"

"OF COURSE I'LL HUG YOU, SANS." He carefully turned and draped an arm over his brother's shoulders. He didn't know whether or not that's what Sans wanted, but it's what _he_ wanted. "THE GREAT PAPYRUS WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU."

"About me?" Sans chuckled, gingerly wrapping his arms around Papyrus's neck.

"YES. I WAS VERY WORRIED ABOUT YOU. WITHOUT ME, YOU WOULD SIMPLY BE A PILE OF LAZY BONES!" Papyrus quipped.

Sans chuckled, "You're right."

After a moment, Papyrus retracted his arm. "I AM ACTUALLY VERY PROUD OF YOU. YOU ATTEMPTED TO RESCUE ME. 'A' FOR EFFORT."

Sans released him and gave him a wide grin.

Alphys came scuttling in. "O-oh! I hope I'm not interrupting anything!"

"NOT AT ALL!" Papyrus began mentally preparing his "thank you" speech for Mettaton.

"Well, I just wanted to say that I found out how the humans b-broke into Mettaton's home." Alphys tapped her claws together.

"It isn't anything serious, s-so don't worry!" Alphys began. "They had a few tiny robots around his house. S-some had cameras- that's how they knew where you guys were. A-and the other ones managed to reverse the flow of electricity in your house so you drained his battery i-instead of, um, charged it. Oh, but I, uh, got rid of them. While you all were... gone. Yeah."

"Good job. Hey, so, how's Mettaton doing?" Sans tried to sound casual. His mind was still buzzing from the thrills of the day and he hadn't had a chance to wind down yet.

"I've fixed the damage done, s-so all he needs to do is charge. Feel free to take him home if you want to. I-I'm sure he wouldn't mind. He really seems to like you two." Alphys eyed them curiously.

Sans yawned, "That's good to know."

Alphys chuckled, "It is pretty late. Or early. H-however you want to put it. You can stay here if you really want to. But I already have Undyne here a-and, uh-"

"We understand," Sans winked, "We have one of Mettaton's chargers at home, right Pap?"

"CORRECT! WE DO!" Papyrus lifted his head energetically. He kind of liked the idea of being bedridden if Mettaton was going to be with him.

"I'm impressed you two are so w-willing to put up with him. So far, he's just gotten you into trouble, heh heh." Alphys casually took a glimpse back to the direction of her bedroom, where Undyne was waiting for her.

"I LIKE TO THINK OF IT AS AN ADVENTURE. JUST A BONUS TO THE RELATIONSHIP, I SUPPOSE." Papyrus chirped.

"R-relationship?" Alphys put a hand over her mouth.

"YES. METTATON AND I. AND SANS AND METTATON. STRANGE, IS IT NOT?" Papyrus announced proudly.

"Oh my god," Alphys grinned, "Oh my god! That- that's adorable! Undyne! Hey, hey Undyne!" Alphys ran off down the hallway.

"That's our cue to get Metta and leave, Pap." Sans shifted and made sure Papyrus wouldn't fall over when he got up.

"IS IT? RIGHT! IT IS!" Papyrus pretended to know what was happening. 

Sans retrieved his robot boyfriend from the repair table and quickly made his way back to Papyrus.

"ARE YOU GOING TO CARRY BOTH OF US?" Papyrus questioned.

"Nah." Sans took the three of them back to the skeletons' house with a little shortcut.

This was nothing new to Papyrus, Sans had been pranking him though space and time ever since he knew how to. Still, it was a little disorienting for him.

"WARN ME BEFORE YOU DO THAT!" Papyrus was slightly bewildered to suddenly be sitting on his own couch.

"Right, sorry, bro." Sans chuckled. He paused for a moment. "It's good to have you back, Pap."

Papyrus smiled. "OF COURSE. ANYONE WOULD MISS THE GREAT PAPYRUS!"

"I'll, uh, let you sleep in your own bed tonight," Sans chuckled. Mettaton was getting heavier by the second. "You want him in there with you?"

"THAT SOUNDS LIKE IT WOULD BE AMAZING." Papyrus looked off to the side dreamily.

Sans nodded and made sure Papyrus wasn't looking before using his magic to carry Mettaton up the stairs. He tossed Mettaton on Papyrus's bed and plugged in his charging cord. Sans figured that if he got cold when he woke up he could situate himself. Sans didn't have the energy to throw the covers over him. He went back downstairs and found that Papyrus was attempting to climb the stairs himself.

"Pap, take it easy. You need to learn when to be lazy once in a while." Sans helped him up the rest of the way.

Papyrus grumbled indignantly.

"Hey, why don't you tell me all about how badass Mettaton must've been- in the morning. And I'll tell you about Undyne." Sans tried not to yawn but it escaped anyway.

"THAT SOUNDS LIKE AN IDEA I CAN GET BEHIND." Papyrus offered a smile. They stopped when they reached Papyrus's room.

"Okay, bro, remember to sleep and relax. Those bones will heal faster if you sleep longer. Then you can get back to being your totally cool self." Sans grinned up at his younger brother. "Not that you're uncool now."

"I AM NEVER NOT COOL." Papyrus announced and limped into his room. "GOODNIGHT SANS," he tried to whisper as he shut the door.

"Night bro," Sans sounded a little solemn.

Papyrus opened the door again. "WHY DON'T YOU JOIN US? IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY AND YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE LONELY RIGHT NOW."

"Your bed isn't-" Sans shrugged. If he can sleep sitting at his post, he can sleep somewhere uncomfortable in his brother's wicked race car bed. "I'd like that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not even sure what counts as graphic these days, but I'm adding the warning because reasons.  
> Also, I like the idea that Asgore never killed a single human, but he got Undyne and the rest of the sentries/royal guard to do it for him because he just doesn't have the heart. That's why Undyne is so adamant on killing the humans, not just fighting them.  
> This chapter is long and I apologize.


	17. The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long. Thank you for your continued support!

The task of getting into bed wasn't easy with Mettaton's long limbs splayed across the blankets. No wonder his own bed was king sized. Tired and not in the mood for gently pushing Mettaton out of Papyrus's way, Sans shoved Mettaton to the side and flopped down at the foot of the bed. Mettaton was in sleep-mode so he didn't mind. Papyrus eased his way under the covers and sighed as he con comfortable. It was good to be back at home with his brother- Mettaton being there was an added perk.

The sound of Sans snoring at the foot of the bed was calming to Papyrus. He shut his eyes and began to recount the day's activities. Boy oh boy was he grateful that he had such good friends. He couldn't wait to hear the heroics of Undyne from Sans. Nor could he wait to tell Sans about Mettaton. It was hard to believe, yet not really that surprising at all, that the robot sleeping next to him was such a badass. Papyrus figured he and Sans were the luckiest blokes in the world to be allowed to call _Mettaton_ their boyfriend.

Papyrus fell asleep thinking about his and Sans's future with Mettaton.

\---

The next day Sans was called over to Alphys's early in the morning. She said it wasn't urgent but she couldn't say what she wanted to over the phone, so he needed to come to her. If he couldn't teleport, he would really be sick of walking back and forth between his house and her lab by now.

He slowly and silently exited Papyrus's room, shut the door and took a shortcut to Alphys's.

 

His sudden appearance next to the scientist caused her to nearly drop her bowl of instant ramen.

"Whacha need, Al?" He grinned sleepily.

Alphys gripped the bowl with her shaking claws and glared at him for a moment before relaxing. "I just w-wanted to tell you that Undyne's, um, _'friends'_ took care of the... _'leftovers'_ from last night." Alphys looked left and right suspiciously.

"Undyne's friends, huh?" Sans chuckled. He wasn't sure why he had to come over if Alphys was just going to speak in "code."

Alphys nodded. "A, um, a _'friendly'_ group of _'motorcyclists.'_ She met one the members at the gym and she hangs out with them occasionally."

Sans shook his head, smiling. It was just like Undyne to make friends with a biker gang. But he was glad the evidence was gone. (Or at least he hoped.) Humans don't turn to dust and there were _probably_ some ramifications of leaving human corpses lying around. "So, is that all you needed to tell me?"

Alphys nodded. She looked at Sans apologetically, "Sorry you had to come over so early. I-I just figured I should tell you as soon as p-possible before I forgot. Heh."

"It's cool. Mind telling me what you're doing awake so early?" Sans inquired.

"I never went to sleep." Alphys sheepishly slurped up some of her ramen. "Don't look at me l-like that! Th-there was an all-night marathon leading up to the premier of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie 3!"

Sans rolled his eyes, grinning. "How did Undyne handle that?"

"She fell asleep somewhere in the middle of the marathon." Alphys glanced in the direction of her bedroom. "B-but I think she deserved the rest."

"I agree. Wouldn't you say the same goes for yourself?" Sans elbowed her.

"Oh, I didn't d-do anything important! I t-turned off the lights and erased their security footage. That's it." Alphys's yellow cheeks turned pinkish with blush.

"C'mon, Doc, you know you played a key role last night." Sans pat her on the back and gave her a gentle shove. "Go to bed."

Alphys recovered from the push and smiled. "You're a, um, a really good friend, Sans. Are you aware of that?"

Sans grinned his signature grin. "Yeah. Picked up the habit of being awesome from my bro."

Alphys snickered. "Obviously." She turned to leave her computer desk but paused. "Oh, good luck being Mettaton's boyfriend." She couldn't prevent the smile that worked its way across her face as she spoke.

"Thanks. After what's been happening around him lately, it looks like I'm going to need it." Sans sighed.

After a brief goodbye the two went their separate ways: Alphys down the hall and Sans back home.

 

Sans returned to his house to find the front door unlocked. Sans peered around. There were no signs of forced entry. But there _were_ two sets of footprints in the snow, not including his own, leading up to the door. One pair was significantly smaller than the other. Sans cracked the door open and looked into his living room. Papyrus was laid upon the couch with proper casting and bandages on his bones and Frisk sat in front of him on the floor, watching TV with him. Sans smiled and approached them.

"AH, THERE YOU ARE, SANS!" Papyrus called from the couch. "WE HAVE A FEW VISITORS IF YOU HAVE NOT NOTICED."

Seeing the short skeleton, Frisk hopped up and scurried over to him with their arms out.

Sans scooped the child up into a tight hug and set them down. "Heya buddy. Whatcha doing here? Don't you have school today?"

Frisk pointed at Papyrus as an answer.

Sans heard a few voices in the kitchen before the lovely and always-welcome-in-his-home Toriel exited said room. "Hello Sans. We were wondering where you had gone off to." She greeted him. She stood next to the couch and put her hand on Papyrus's forehead. "Frisk and I heard that Papyrus had gotten hurt and we decided to come and aid in his recuperation. Frisk and I shall be off to school shortly. I have phoned in a substitute for now." She offered a warm smile.

"We appreciate it, don't we, Pap?" Sans ruffled Frisk's hair. Frisk grinned and began fixing their hair as they ran back to their spot on the floor.

"CERTAINLY!" Papyrus announced, looking up and giving Toriel a grin only a skeleton can give.

Sans briefly wondered where Mettaton was, but he saw the robot's leg sticking out from the kitchen, answering his question.

Mettaton announced, "Papyrus, darling, your get-well-soon soup is almost ready," and retracted his leg.

"Soup was Frisk's idea." Toriel beamed. "If made correctly, the soup will help his bones heal much faster, according to Frisk."

Frisk nodded to confirm the information to be true.

Toriel made her way around the couch and motioned for Frisk to follow her. "Come my child, we must be going now." Toriel stopped in front of Sans and announced to the room, "We shall come back and visit after school." She then leaned down and whispered to Sans, "I told your robot friend not to put glitter in the soup, but I do not think he listened." She stood back up and took Frisk by the hand.

"IT WAS VERY NICE TO SEE SUCH CARING FANS OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS!" Papyrus waved as they left.

Seconds after the door shut, Sans saw a hand- connected to a snaking robotic arm- come out of the kitchen and head right towards him. Mettaton grabbed him by the front of his shirt and dragged him through the living room into the kitchen. Sans didn't mind; it saved him the walking energy.

Mettaton held Sans off the ground by his shirt as he calmly tended to the soup on the stove. He spared the skeleton a glance and set him down. "Leave a note next time you disappear, okay dear?"

"Yeah. Sorry." Sans shrugged. He didn't bother straightening up his shirt and put his hands back into his jacket pockets.

"Poor Papyrus woke up when you left and became worried when he heard the front door shut." Mettaton spoke as he turned off the stove and prepared a bowl of soup for Papyrus. "He woke me up and asked me to take him downstairs to wait for you." Mettaton shot him a glare and gave Sans the bowl- complete with spoon and garnish... of glitter. He pointed to the living room and tapped his foot impatiently.

Mettaton was such a mom when he was angry, yet relieved.

Sans gave Mettaton a smirk and left the kitchen. He stepped in front of his brother and held the bowl out to him. "Soup."

"YES IT IS. I SUPPOSE YOU ARE OFFERING IT TO ME." Papyrus shifted so he could hold the bowl in his lap, leaving space on the couch that Sans happily took.

Mettaton joined the two of them in the living room momentarily. Seeing that there was no room on the couch cushions, Mettaton opted to lay across the back of the couch. He gave Sans a curt pat on the head to let him know they were on good terms. "Ooh, I see you've been watching my Holiday Specials! Excellent taste, darlings." He cooed upon seeing the TV screen.

"It's just you in various outfits with a decked-out tree in the background." Sans snickered.

"I SEE NO PROBLEM WITH THAT." Papyrus shrugged.

"There isn't one." Mettaton assured him.

Sans decided not to comment further on the matter. He looked over at Papyrus, who seemed to be enjoying the soup despite the glitter. He then remembered something that he said last night. "Why don't I tell you about how cool Undyne was yesterday?"

Papyrus perked up. "THAT SOUNDS LIKE A SPLENDID IDEA. OH, AND THEN I GET TO TELL YOU ABOUT METTATON, YES?"

"Oh yes, _do_ let him talk about me." Mettaton purred, sensually lifted a leg in the air.

"Sure thing, buddy." Sans smiled and turned slightly so he could tell his story.

 

When Sans finished, Mettaton had a newfound respect for Undyne and Papyrus had an increased admiration for her. Then Papyrus eagerly began regaling Sans about his and Mettaton's adventures in the warehouse.

Papyrus never really finished talking, but he did finish his "getting skele-napped and saved by his sexy robot boyfriend" story; however, he got distracted and started talking about something else afterwards. Mettaton didn't really care that Papyrus stopped talking about him, he was just enjoying listening to Papyrus's unique voice. Once the new information stopped and the other Papyrus blabbering started, Sans felt as though it was safe to zone out.

Sans thought about how glad he was that he overcame his initial hesitation with Mettaton, despite the awful turn of events that happened after he decided to get close with the robot. But he liked seeing Papyrus be with someone who genuinely had affection for him. And Sans also liked having someone who seemed to genuinely like _him_ as his boyfriend. He didn't care for Mettaton's money or fame, or even that sleek body. Both skeletons would be fine with the rectangle. Sans wondered how the relationship would work while Mettaton was making his shows. He figured they would just have to find out. 

Sans vaguely remembered Papyrus berating him for falling asleep while he was being talked to... as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so concludes the story.  
> I'm glad you finished it!
> 
> Might add an epilogue, might not.  
> Major shrugging from my part.


End file.
